Rants About It All

For My Love

2010-11-04T11:17:00.004-04:00

I know that I don't always tell you, or show you how much I love you. I know that lately, ever since my pancreatitis took place, that I have become incredibly moody, mean, and downright hard to deal with on the worst of days.

I do want you to know that I love you more than my words could ever say. Your happiness means the world to me every day, even if I don't have the ability to show it much due to the various pains I'm going through.

You know that literally, without you, I would have already been dead. Deny it all you want, you know that if I would have taken that pain pill that day and laid down, I would not have gotten back up.

I hope you know that I can't live without you. You mean so much to me. My life without you would be a very cold and lonely existence.

I may be rambling a bit now, but I don't care. I love you, and live for you. You are what makes the sun shine in my world, and you make a moonlit night romantic.

I love you with all my heart!

Anger, Fear, and Depression

2010-09-28T12:16:00.003-04:00

I was a different man before October 14th of last year. I was more of a carefree soul. I used to love life and enjoy it every day that I could.

Now that has all changed.

I am aware of the changes in me, and my increasingly deteriorating life, health, and mental capacity. I don't know how to stop what I am starting to feel is the inevitable.

Now I am always depressed. Mainly it is because I have new sets of limitations the most definitely know when I'm pushing the envelope. These physical limitations has affected my state of mind as well.

Things that I used to do playfully just come off as annoying now. It isn't who I used to be.

I feel like my whole life is starting to fall apart, and I can do nothing but sit and watch as it slowly drains away.

I feel like I'm losing the love of my life too, which is very depressing. Things have happened in our relationship that may have caused damage beyond repairing, even though we will both probably fight as hard as we can to make things work out.

I hope it isn't too late.

I can feel her slipping away from me, and our line of communication isn't what it once was. I see her face from day to day, and even though she puts on her best happy smile, her eyes tell me a different story. I may have hurt her too badly. She means so much to me, but I know she doesn't feel like she does. I think she may be questioning why she stays in this relationship with me, but I know she loves me. I used to be a different guy for her. I used to romance her, I used to go out of my way to make sure she had a great time and was happy. I think she doesn't believe anything I tell her. I think she questions my love for her.

I hope I'm wrong, but I fear I'm not.

I have a much shorter fuse than I have ever had before. I snap at and get annoyed by the smallest of things. She teases me and calls me the "get off my lawn guy", but it really isn't a joke...it's becoming reality.

I have severe road rage, and I don't like that, however justified it may be.

I feel as though I am slowly losing my sanity. What little bit I ever had. I feel like my mind is being pulled in so many directions, and soon it's going to tear itself into shreds.

My finances are at rock bottom. I have about 3 lawsuits against me right now for money I don't have and can't afford to give. I never used to worry about money, but recently, it has become so much more important, and I can't figure out how or why.

My family life isshot as well. My relationship with my mother has become better, and it is taxing because I don't know if it did because I take her to work every night, or because it really was meant to get better. I love talking to one of my sisters and even hanging out with her from time to time. Not so much with my other sister. I am not talking to her, nor do I feel like having any kind of involvement with her.

Work is work. That is actually one part of my life I feel is improving. I finally got a good schedule and I'm matching everyone else in my department in pay.

My immune system has probably suffered the most. I always have stomach aches from and back pains as well. With my immunity being so low, I have been catching colds and viruses much easier than I used to. I have also been on some sort of pain medication since the day I went into the hospital.

I hate the fact that I have become this way. I can't stand myself anymore, and many times I just wish that it would all just end so I don't have to live with myself anymore. All because I don't know how to get myself back.

Sorry Folks

2010-03-23T09:15:00.002-04:00

As much as I hate to do it, my blog has been inundated with spam comments so I have decided to add CAPTCHA back in for comments. I hate doing this, but it has gotten way out of hand this week.

An Open Letter To Mother Nature

2010-02-25T09:13:00.002-05:00

Dear Mother Nature,

While I do appreciate a good coating of snow on my town on occasion, I would like to lodge a formal complaint that this year you have gone well and beyond your usual snow accumulation, and I am officially presenting you with this cease and desist order.

Your continuous snowfall on this town has begun to impede daily operations more than usual.

Please quit sending snow here, as people in this town are mentally and physically incapable of driving in it, and the school system doesn't know when to stay open and when to shut down, and they usually get those mixed up and end up staying open when they should be closing, and closing when they should be open.

So, in closing, Mother Nature, I only have but two words for you concerning this recent onslaught of snow and the icy demeanor you've been sending our way...STOP IT!

To My Beautiful Redneckgirl

2010-02-20T11:35:00.002-05:00

You know, ever since I laid eyes on you, I can undoubtedly say that I wanted you. I wanted you in ways I had never known before but I had to keep my distance. Back then, what I wanted was unobtainable, so I sat and admired from not so afar. My longing to know the real you continued to grow and grow, and we had to become friends after that. When we became friends, I realized that not only are you beautiful on the outside, but on the inside as well. This made me long for you even more. However, the timing still wasn't right, and by this point, I had not fallen head over heels in love with you, but it was coming, and it was going to hit me hard...much harder than anything I have ever known before it.

After a few years of wanting and not doing, things started going bad for you in your current relationship. I was there, for as much of it as I could be, and I tried everything to make it better. It killed me inside to see you with sad eyes. As a matter of fact, one of the things I love about you the most is your eyes. They radiate mystery, fun, and playfulness, except when they are sad. I've always felt as though I could unravel the mysteries in the universe by looking into your eyes long enough, but I never last long because passion takes over and I lose control.

Then we came to the point where we tried each other on for size, so to speak. However, you were still unsure about what it was that you wanted to do, and there was another small surprise. But after that time we spent together, my fate was sealed. I would always be tied to you, even if I couldn't be with you. I was in love...not for the first time, but I had never fallen this hard for anyone before. I thought I had experienced pain, but I knew nothing of it until the day I couldn't talk to you or hold you in my arms. Then real pain began.

Luckily, it didn't last too long, as I had a feeling that we were destined to be together, and you came back. You were cautious at first, not wanting to hurt me anymore, but soon, you gave over to what you really wanted, and that was me. Imagine my excitement when you decided we should try each other again, and for real this time.

That was one of the many happiest days of my existence. Another is when we went to see Gary Allan perform in Owensboro, and I asked you to officially go out with me, and you said yes!

The next would definitely have to be on May 28th, 2009, when we went to Juno Beach, FL. and I proposed on the beach. Never had I ever seen you so happy in my entire life. To be able to see that in your eyes justified what I wanted. I knew that i wanted to spend the rest of my entire life making you happy. Making you smile, and making you feel more loved than you have ever felt. I only hope I'm living up to that still.

The next best time wasn't really a best time for me, but it did show me your devotion to me. That was in October, when pancreatitis almost killed me. You stuck by my side, even though it looked like there was no chance that I was going to pull through, but you stayed. That was the strength I needed to actually fight harder to pull through. I'm very happy that you are so devoted to me.

You have made my life so much better, and in the process, have made me a better person, and a better man. I love you with my entire being and I think I would rather go without eating, oxygen, or sleeping rather than be without you.

I love you so very much.

Why Can't I Stop?

2010-02-19T10:48:00.002-05:00

So here I am, diagnosed with all kinds of bad things that have the ability to kill me if I don't change my bad eating habits, yet, I still eat the same. Granted, I drink mostly water now and no sodas that are not diet and with no caffeine, but I still have the extreme weakness with my Chips and candy....especially the sweet stuff!

I know that my condition, as it is, can be irritated and I could be killed by the things I can't stop doing. So why do I continue? Do I have a death wish? Am I so weak that the simple though of candy and chips will drive me into a frenzy and I start to eat them like crazy? I really don't know, but the one thing I do know is that I need to stop. I need to find a way to give it all up once and for all. I need to just accept that I can't be like everyone else and eat like there is no tomorrow, because for me, it could be true. But How? How does one begin? I wish I knew how I could beat the one adversary that continues to plague me...myself.

Addendum

2010-02-02T14:44:00.002-05:00

I have to say that there is one wonderful thing in my life that keeps me going and not just completely losing it 100%. That would be Brandy. She has a way of breathing life into me when I'm with her. She is the most passionate person I have ever met, and I could never imagine what life would be like without her. She is my absolute everything.

Even when we argue, it is just so heated and so passionate, that I just get turned on by it. That fact alone annoys her to death. She hates when we argue and I get that old familiar look in my eyes, and get this cheesy grin on my face. That's part of the magic of us, and believe me, we are a very magical couple.

While certain things have changed between us due to being around each other all the time, or circumstances that have changed us, we remain one with the other.

I love that about her.

She is most definitely my heart and possibly even my soul, and she is the most wonderful woman I have ever known.

I love her with all my heart and soul. Period.

Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired

2010-02-02T11:46:00.003-05:00

I swear, if it isn't one thing then it's something else! I just wanna go out and yell to the world that I'm here, and come do with me what you will. I hate that I'm always sick, or feeling sick. I have begun to feel nauseated a lot more than ever, and my pain levels are starting to mount again.

I am not one for the slow and casual. If I need to be taken out, then do it and get it over with. If not, then stop messing with me. This slow recovery, if you can call it that, is tortuous. one day I'm feeling great, then the next week and a half I feel like crap.

Anyone wanna play Russian Roulette? I'll even take your shot.

I Have Been Changed

2010-01-21T09:32:00.002-05:00

I feel that certain things happen to certain people for certain reasons. However, I can't fathom why something like this had to happen to me. It doesn't make any sense as I see all of these people getting to enjoy the foods and drinks they want without consequence but if I start doing that again, I would surely die or come very close again.

This is one of the many facets of why I have changed. I wish I could say I have changed for the better, but I cannot. I have become less jovial, more serious, angry and bitter, and depressed as well. I haven't let many people in on the depression because I definitely don't want to have to take more meds.

unfortunately, the anger and bitterness I have no control over, so more people see that than I intend, and people are starting to think I'm mean.

I hate to say it, but I can live with people thinking I'm mean. Some people do no matter what I try and how nice I try to be. So I say screw em.

I don't want to be this way, but I have no idea of how to reclaim the person I was before this all happened. I feel empty inside and don't know how to refill the hole again. I also feel like I'm losing the one person in the world I can't do without. The rift between her and myself is becoming clearer to me all the time, and I seem powerless to stop it from happening. I'm even to the point that sometimes I think she may be better off without me, because I'm nothing but a burden to her and I am holding her back from living the kind of life she wants.

I am starting to hate the person I have become, and I fear it may get much worse as time goes on unless I find a way to stop it.

Stop Me Before I Kill........Myself!!!

2010-01-16T14:20:00.002-05:00

I thought the pain and depression and agony of my hospital stay would be the most agonizing part of the healing process. I was wrong. Very, very, very wrong.

The hardest part is what I'm trying to do now. I am trying to change my diet and eating habits so I don't end up back in the hospital or dead.

I'm supposed to be on a pretty strict diet plan, only taking in 1700 cals a day and 195 grams of carbs.

I'm growing weaker and am going back to eating the bad stuff almost on a daily basis. I hate that, but I have no willpower to tell myself to stop doing it. I don't exercise like I should either.

One thing I have been consistently good at is the drinks. I have not had anything that was not diet and sugar free since I went in. I'm proud of that, but I want the food thing too. I want to be able to get over this plateau and finally stop eating all of the junk and eat the way I need to.

I'll keep everyone appraised of my situation. Wish me well in this endeavor because my will is one thing I have not ever tried to fight against, and the battle will be difficult!

It's Been Awhile Part 2

2010-01-14T10:47:00.002-05:00

Ok, so last I left off, I had been sent home from the hospital with no pain meds, and I had scheduled an appointment with my doctor for the very next day.

I went in and they sat me up on the little table and took my blood pressure and heart rate...you know, all of those good things. Then the doctor walked in with my charts and told me that he was putting me back into the hospital. He said I should have not been released yet, and that my condition was not finished creating chaos in my life.

This time I was admitted to the hospital right next to the docs office, and I stayed there until October 30th. The room was much more extravagant than the one I had previously at the other hospital, with lots of room, a better bed, and a nice HD TV...not a big one, but still nice :)

I also had a wifi connection there, but couldn't get online much because I would get nauseated looking at the screen due to the sheer amount of drugs I was on.

After a couple of days, I had been getting almost daily visits from 3 doctors. They drew labs and had CT scans done to me, and let me know that the reason I was there was because my pancreas had decided to start eating itself, as the triglycerides were so high and had no place to go. I lost a little over a third of my pancreas. They said in order to get it to stop, they fist had to get my levels down to a manageable level. Unfortunately for me, the only way to do that was to connect a PICC line to me and feed me TPN via a feeding tube. That also meant that I didn't get to eat any "real" food during this time either. They kept me there and I dealt with the ups and downs of being in that place...It would be ok when I had visitors, but the times when I was all by myself in that room led to deep bouts of depression.

I wanted out and I wanted off of that stupid bag too. But it wasn't time for that yet. By the time October 30th came around, I did whatever I had to do to get them to let me go home that evening. Redneckgirl had gone and learned how to use the pump for a portable TPN bag as well as the steps to change it every day. I gotta say, she would be not only an awesome nurse, but a smokin' hot one as well!

I lived on nothing but the bag until a few days before Thanksgiving, when one of my docs said I could start trying real food again. Soon after that, I was off of the bag, and trying to regain my stamina back.

During the whole ordeal I had lost 21 lbs and my muscles atrophied badly. One of my TPN nurses said I had the body of a 70 year old man, and that it would take awhile to get it back to where it should be. I'm still actively dealing with that aspect. I don't have the stamina yet that I used to, but it is getting better.

As you can see, it has been a hard road and an even harder thing to accept that I am not invincible or bulletproof; that I can be hurt just like anyone else. Dealing with that fact on a day to day basis is hard to do, but I am learning, and I'll keep posting about what's going on.

It's Been Awhile Part 1

2010-01-11T14:20:00.002-05:00

Oh it really has, and so much has happened since then. Mainly, just a little over a month after I posted my last post, I almost died.

I thought that might grab your attention. That's right, I said died.

On October 9th, I worked my last day of work for what was to be a weeks vacation. Little did I know that I would not be returning to my desk until the beginning of January.

Redneckgirl and I started our vacation nice and early, and we drove out to Belterra Casino for her birthday, in order to spend some time gambling a bit and some quality alone time away from real life. We stayed there until October 13th, and she got her "amazing" gift from the casino before we left....a t-shirt...lol!

We drove home and enjoyed a night alone together. Nights like those are hard to come by with children and family all over the place, so we enjoyed them when we had the chance to.

On the morning of the 14th, we got up early and had breakfast at McDonalds. I had a large coke and a sausage biscuit. I remember this so well because it was the last food I would eat for at least 45 days.

Around 10:30, I started having severe stomach pains, so bad that I was doubled over with tears in my eyes. Redneckgirl suggested that I go to the ER, but I told her that I would take a pain pill and try to sleep. On a side note, if I "had" done that, I would most definitely be dead.

In less than 10 minutes, I agreed to go to the ER because the pain was increasing. We walked in the doors and they immediately got started working me in because they thought I was having a heart attack. I told them as much as I could, but I remeber that all the questions seemed stupid. Of course, I didn't realize the seriousness of the situation.

They got me into a room and shot me full of morphine. What I remember of the room was a tiny place with 1 or 2 chairs and a tv hanging on the wall, as well as a bathroom. Most of my time in this room were my darkest hours. Redneckgirl barely left my side as she was scared to death that this was the end for me, and she wanted to be there in the event that it was. She sat and read her Twilight books for the first 4 days I was there. Those days were mostly getting a morphine shot, then sleeping until the pain woke me up again. I hardly spoke a word during those few days, and I honestly think that everyone expected the worst from my situation.

The fifth day was surgery day. They were going to remove my gall bladder because they thought that was what had caused my pain.

When I walked in and after they took my labs, they said my blood sugar was extremely high, and that taking my blood was like getting pudding into a tube....I know...kinda gross right?

They also made me aware of my high blood pressure, which was through the roof due to the pain, and high cholesterol, especially my triglycerides. Now, I don't want everyone to go look to see what it all means right now, but a person who has high triglycerides has a level of about 200 to 250. Mine was 12,000. I haven't heard so many shocked people in my life when they would hear of or read that. Needless to say, I am now a case study for doctors. According to a few doctors I have spoken with, they said that when you walk into a hospital in that much pain, and with levels that high, usually you don't walk out.

Getting back to the surgery, I had some gall stones and they thought that had caused my pancreatitis. They took the gall bladder out and sent me home the next morning. Six days in the hospital for all that, and I was still in pain, and hadn't eaten anything except liquids. That's all they would let me have. Clear liquid diets suck by the way!

On the day of my release, I find that they sent me home with some prescriptions, but no pain medication. I immediately called my family doctor and scheduled an appointment for the next day to get some pain meds.

From Beyond the Grave!

2009-09-10T12:09:00.002-04:00

On August 4th, we had some really bad storms come through town. I had never seen what a flash flood was or could really do until this storm ripped through town. I was in a bad part of town as far as the flooding was concerned. My car took water inside, and I had a power outage that claimed my TV. I had been watching one of the kids small 13" TV until about 2 weeks ago when I decided to spring for an HDTV. I couldn't handle watching the tiny screen any more. With the new TV, I needed to completely change the way my entertainment center looked because the TV wouldn't fit in the one I had. With that, I had decided I had way too many DVDs, so I went through a process of eliminating some from my collection. I came up with about 75 DVDs I no longer needed. I didn't want to just throw them out, so I took them to pawn shops trying to sell them.

Apparently, I had one there called Road to Perdition. I had inherited a bunch of movies from my friend Scott after he passed away. This was one of them but I had forgotten, because most of them were cheesy B-movie horror flicks. Brandy and I are standing in the pawn shop, and the woman is checking out the DVDs to see which they are willing to buy from me, and she hands me a picture of my friend Scott that was inside of the Road to Perdition DVD.

I couldn't believe it. It felt like he was telling me not to get rid of the movie, so I ended up keeping it. Kinda spooky if you ask me.

Concert Goers

2009-08-27T12:24:00.003-04:00

So I know most of you have probably been to a concert or two in your lifetime. I've been to enough that I know the "rules" of the show. I have a huge problem with people who don't know the rules.

I bring this up because Brandy and I went to see Gary Allan perform on Tuesday at our state fair. I must say that together we've been to see Gary Allan a few times, and he just keeps getting better and better! If you haven't heard of Gary Allan, go look him up on Youtube or wherever you can hear some music for free...I'll wait.

Ok, so now that you're back, I'll get back to the story.

We're at the concert and there are certain unspoken "rules" to the event. For instance, as long as the house lights are on, the band is not performing. Yet, people always start screaming and yelling when they hear an instrument being tuned by the stage hands and start going crazy. This was especially annoying on Tuesday when we were there mainly due to these to wanna be cowgirls two seats down from us. They were pretty tore up and wearing their cowboy hats with feathers and other odd things in them. Every time one of the roadies started tuning a guitar, they would jump up and scream their heads off. House lights were on though.

Another set is the ones who hold their drinks up during the performance. They act as if the singer is going to stop performing right there, walk up th where they are sitting, and drink the drink being offered to them by the person. I think it would be funny if it actually happened...lol!

Another set of people who annoy me at concerts are the people who point at themselves. Why are you pointing at yourself? You didn't do anything and in a sea of 10,000 people, you won't get noticed by the band.

Then there are the people who high five each other. I happen to be guilty of this though at this concert. I was belting out the tune with the band, and the guy behind me must have been impressed because he grabbed me by the shoulder and the next thing I know...high five city. I was putting it all out there, because this is my favorite band of all time.

Then there are the people who don't know about the false finish. For those that don't know, the false finish is when the band plays their last song of the night and leaves the stage. However, the rule is that if the house lights are still down, the show isn't over and they are going to come back out for an encore of usually 2 or 3 more songs. It kills me to see people start to shuffle out the doors when this happens. I sit in my place, or stand, like I was Tuesday, and watch as these people miss the rest of the show. Then, when the audience has dwindled down, and the band comes back out, I enjoy the rest of the show. Basically, the show isn't over until the house lights come back up.

Anyways, that is my small rant that isn't really a rant. We had an awesome time and will plan on seeing him again soon :)

We're Engaged!

2009-08-06T07:31:00.007-04:00

Well, I have finally asked Brandy to marry me, as I had said in a previous post. I wanted to post the story here so everyone would know :)

It was the end of May when it happened. We drove to Juno Beach Florida, and she had no idea of what was going to happen. We get there on Thursday, May 28th, and since I had never been to Florida before, the first thing I wanted to see was the beach.

We go down to the beach for about 30 minutes before we do just about anything there, and got some pretty good pics. This is the only time I had my camera at the beach, because every other time it was dark, or I was in the water.

Now, my original plan was to ask her on Saturday night, on the beach, at sunset. However, we get to the hotel room and I'm watching the weather forecast, and it calls for rain the whole weekend. I decide that I can't risk waiting until Saturday to do it, so I try to make a backup plan.

Brandy, her sister, and I decide to get some food, so we go to eat and afterwards, Brandy and I went back down to the beach. It was past sunset when we got there, and the beach was dark, but definitely still romantic and beautiful. We stood there looking at the black waters of the ocean, listening to the sound of the ocean, and enjoying the breeze. She pulled me closer and told me that this was so perfect. I said that it wasn't and she asked me why. I told her that it wasn't perfect because I had not asked her to marry me yet. Then I pulled out the ring and showed it to her.

Even in the limited light on the beach, I could see the sparkle and the tears welling up in her eyes. She asked if she was dreaming, and then said yes! I slid the ring on her finger and pulled her close to me and kissed her. She spent the rest of the night, and a lot of the rest of the trip in disbelief. She definitely didn't expect it to happen.

One of the cutest things ever is when I catch her checking it out, kinda looking to her side and just looking at the sparkle of the ring.

I'll definitely keep you all posted on developments on the wedding as they occur. I hope you enjoyed this post as well.

My First Post of 2009!

2009-07-30T13:35:00.003-04:00

I know....I know. I have severely neglected this blog for almost a year. I would be surprised if anyone was still reading it, but I know someone is. I got a comment on an old, old post, and it made me miss the glory days of blogging :)

So, an update to the place I call my life. I no longer work at the cable company. I now work for a credit card processor. I like the job a lot better. The cable company started really pounding the sales process into our little heads and was on the verge of starting a quota when I decided it was time for me to go. Anyone who knows me knows that I couldn't sell a bible to a nun that had lost hers, so I had no chance of surviving in there.

I also have a new car. Not a "new" car, but one I had not previously owned before. It's a 98 Saturn SL2 and it's a fine little car with very obvious design flaws with in the comfort area, but it'll do fine for now.

The best news is that I am still with Brandy, and we are now engaged. I proposed on the beach in Florida to her on May28th of this year, and she said yes....on the same day even. So now we are planning our wedding out. The kids are getting so big too.

Well, that should be a decent update for now. Perhaps more at a later date, depending on who reads it.

R.I.P. Lil Explorer

2008-08-21T11:47:00.003-04:00

I am putting my Explorer to rest on Saturday. It has now developed a bad case of bad transmission, and is too costly to try to fix.

Funeral services will be held at Carmax, with all proceeds going toward my new car fund.

I've had some good times with the Explorer, and it has served me well in the 5 years I have owned it. I will surely miss it.

Girls Night Out!

2008-04-03T13:56:00.003-04:00

I found this joke online and thought it was pretty funny :)

The other night I was invited out for a night with the 'girls.' I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, 'I promise!'

Well, the hours passed and the margarita's went down way too easily. Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home.

Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hallway started up and cuckooed 3 times. Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution in order to escape a possible conflict with him.

(Even when totally smashed... 3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos = MIDNIGHT!)

The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, I told him 'MIDNIGHT'... he didn't seem pissed off in the least. Whew, I got away with that one!

Then he said 'We need a new cuckoo clock.'

When I asked him why, he said, 'Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said 'oh shit.' Cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted.

WTF is this about

2008-04-02T08:09:00.003-04:00

I found this whilst browsing through the web today. Is this for real? I mean, who in their right mind would use this on "that" area of their body?

You can bet everything in the bank that this wouldn't get near mine....LMAO!!!

Girls = Evil!!!

2008-03-28T10:02:00.002-04:00

I wonder how much truth there is to this? LMAO!!!

Bloody Disgusting!

2008-03-19T13:59:00.002-04:00

I was walking through the web one fine day (today) and I came across this website:

Tweeze Me!

Check it out and let me know what you think!

Hehe....I'm Blogging!

2008-03-19T11:42:00.002-04:00

So this is a bit of an update to my already declining blog. I hope to blog more in the future, but I always say that, so it's kinda redundant.

So, with me, I have been through quite a bit. Last April or June I collapsed on my front porch after coming home from work and ended up spending most of the night in the hospital. Apparently, I have high blood pressure and diabetes. on top of being sick that day, some sort of freak chain reaction caused me to collapse.

I had driven home and parked my truck. After what seemed an eternity, I finally managed to get the door open and almost fell out of the truck. I started stumbling up the walkway and made it to the steps. Again, a second eternity passed in this time frame. I started climbing the steps and then everything went dark. I remember bits of what happened next because apparently I was fading in and out.

I remember a truck stopping in the middle of the street and a guy asking if I was ok. I remember yelling that I was, even though I found out later that I may not have spoken at all. I also remember Brandy trying to help me to my feet, and the truck guy as well, trying to get me in the house. Apparently, she saw me go down, and rushed over to help. Honorable mention goes to her grandmother, who lives across the street from me, who rushed over as well, falling and scraping her knee.

I remember someone saying I was burning up and bringing me water. I then remember the EMT's getting there and I vaguely remember an exchange of words as Brandy, her grandmother, and the EMT's tried to talk me into going with them. I ended up going.

We get to the hospital and they say my heart rate is through the roof, and that my blood sugars are severely high. That and I was sick too. I ended up staying in a room for quite awhile and they gave me some steroids and morphine, as well as something for my sickness. They wanted to wait till my heart rate dropped before letting me go home, which I suppose is understandable.

On a followup to my doctor, he prescribes me some medicines to control both blood pressure and diabetes, and asks me to start exercising and trying to lose weight.

I went through the longest period of time in denial about the diabetes. Now, I take it serious a little more and am trying to change the way I do things.

I have joined Weight Watchers with Brandy, which will be discussed in other posts, and am trying to eat healthier.

I am still alive, and will remain to be if I have any form of control at all.

By the way, hi to all my reader (lol...that is meant to be singular).

I hope you are all doing well, and please feel free as always to comment.

What Kind of a World Are We Living In???

2007-12-02T09:07:00.000-05:00

I saw this picture last night in the window of a local bank, and had to snap off a pic for everyone to see.

This snowman, this nasty little snowman really disturbs me.

Doesn't anyone else see that he is pleasuring himself on that tree? This is being displayed in a public place for all to see!

Perhaps he has the right to please himself in this fashion. Maybe his snowgasm is a warranted thing.

I never wondered where snow came from before last night...but now.......LOL!!!

WOW!!!

2007-08-23T15:09:00.000-04:00

It's been so long since I did this. I just wanted to drop by and say hello to anyone who still checks in on me. Sorry I've been away so long, but life happened and there just wasn't time.

That and I really haven't had much to say lately. So, if anyone sees this, hello, and I hope I'll be blogging again soon here.

P.S. I started another one today, located at http://thecustomersareassholes.blogspot.com :)

For My Mindtwister

2007-05-02T12:07:00.001-04:00

Love,
Your Redneckgirl

A long month.....

2007-05-02T10:53:00.000-04:00

Well to update both Mindtwister and I have had some fairly serious medical issues this month. Also Hard2Stop's father had to go back in the hospital; there were a few scares but he's doing a little better now. Any prayers and good thoughts sent his way would be much appreciated!

My boys are doing pretty good both getting over yet another round of StrepThroat. My oldest son did really well on his report card and my youngest is well on his way to being potty trained!

I REALLY miss my blog.....I miss my friends, the feedback, having a place to vent, etc. In a few months (hopefully) I will return to my blog :)

On a positive note......there's only a few days left until Derby! This is the one time of year that I really let myself have fun. I pamper myself a little, buy a new outfit, get a pedicure and take a break from the everyday stress of real life. Happy Derby!

RedNeckGirl's New Favorite Song

2007-04-02T12:48:00.000-04:00

Pink - U + Ur Hand

Hey Ya'll.........just a little update!

2007-03-29T10:34:00.000-04:00

Hi to all of my blogger friends........I have missed ya'll soooooooooooooooooo MUCH!!!!!! Things have been pretty hectic in my life lately, my work (office job) has been horrible! On top of the Tax HELL that i've been in, we were audited by the office on unemployment and by our international.........the international auditor was here for over 3 weeks!!! She is still calling me every other day for me to fax her more crap! I made over 2000 copies for this woman while she was here! Nice lady but I was soooooooo glad to see her leave ;) My 2nd job (pizza place) has been a little more stressful than usual, we've had 3 people quit in the last few weeks. I've been trying to pick up more hours but with my day job and my kiddos i feel guilty.

In Feb. My ex's father passed away, it was very unexpected. I have been trying to help him deal with the grief and all that has happened since his father's death. It's a truly helpless feeling; knowing someone is hurting but not knowing how to make them feel better. At first my kids had a very difficult time dealing with their Poppy's passing but my oldest son's strong faith in God and Heaven has helped us all get through. My littlest guy doesn't really understand what happened but he was sad and crying because he knew we were sad and crying. Say a little prayer for them and the family.

Both my kids have been sick, passing it back and forth to one another. My oldest son was out of school for a week. I think they are both finally starting to be on the mend. I am keeping my fingers crossed!

Thank goodness for the help from my family, friends and mindtwister! I'd probably be crazy if it weren't for them......oh wait a minute.......I'm already crazy....LOL

Well I just wanted all of you to know that I miss you and will post more soon! Love and Hugs!

P.S.
I am on myspace http://www.myspace.com/brandybrb if anyone else is........I try to check it every other day or so......and my email is brandybrb@yahoo.com if anyone wants to write!

More Valentine's Day

2007-02-23T23:50:00.000-05:00

Here are the other pics from Valentine's Day.

This is a closeup of the jewels hanging from the wire basket.

This is a shot of everything once again, except for the things I gave her early.

The early stuff I had to break out because she needed it.

I had gone and got her 2 bottles of her favorite perfume 'Realities'. Now, a few years back they reformulated this perfume and runied it, and discontinued the original formula that she really loved.

Needless to say, this stuff can be hard to find. I was at Meijers one day and saw a bottle, so I bought it, and asked the woman behind the counter if there was any more. She looked and found only 1 more bottle, so I bought that too.

I had to give those to her early, and she's once again loving the smell of the original 'Realities'.

Valentine's Day

2007-02-23T23:30:00.000-05:00

As you all know, it was Valentine's Day recently, and as always, I try to go all out on The Love Of My Life to let her know how much I love her. I went out and got a bevy of things for her, some of which I was forced to give her early.

I decided to show you all what I got for her :)

This is everything she actually got on Valentine's Day. There is, as you can see, a bear, a dozen roses with a heart shaped vase, a card, a basket, and a wrapped gift.

This is a shot of the cute bear I got. I think she really liked it!

This shot is more focused on the roses.

This is the basket. I'm proud of this as I created it on my own. First, I bought the basket, which is a wire basket with little heart decorations of the side. I put red tissue paper in the basket to keep its contents from falling out of the bottom. Then I got some candy hearts, and some Sweet Tart hearts and put a couple of handfuls of each in the bottom. Then I got some rose petals (not real ones), and covered the candy with them. After that went more candy, then more roses until all the rose petals were gone. I really like how this turned out :)

This was a gift I wrapped for her in tissue paper. This gift contained the Special Edition of the movie Grease, one of her favorites.

Mindtwister Reporting In!

2007-02-23T23:26:00.000-05:00

It's been a little while since redneckgirl or myself have blogged.

Just wanted you all to know we are ok, and that we have both been super busy with the jobs and all.

I have a spot of good news myself, as tonight will be my last "night" of work.

I have finally gotten the opportunity to change my schedule here to a morning schedule, and I'm stoked!

that means I get to spend more time with my beloved redneckgirl and not have to miss activities because I'm at work.

I have so much to blog about, and if I get the opportunity, I'll start with more tonight, probably starting with Valentine's Day with pics.

So that's the update on us :)

I hope you guys and gals are doing well out there, and we'll be talking to you real soon!

Happy Valentine's Day!

2007-02-14T01:00:00.000-05:00

If someone were to ask me what I would give up willingly, it would be everything but you.

If I was asked what I couldn't live without, that answer would be you.

I could be without everything else in this world but you.

It's so hard to believe we are where we are, especially when we look back on the rocky road we had traveled before.

I know I am the most lucky man in the world to have your love, and I plan on staying that way.

I love you more and more every day. You keep on amazing me by showing me how much you love me, and making me see that I can love more than I ever thought possible.

My entire life has changed because of you.

You are my sun, moon, stars....my entire world.

I know that my life would be a lot different without you, and nowhere near as great as it is now.

Here is a video that reminds me of you. I hope you like it as much as I do, as it always makes me think of you.

Happy Valentine's Day Sweetness! I Love You!

P.S. I wanna wish all of our blogger friends a Happy Valentine's Day too! I hope yours is filled with as much love as mine is :)

Redneckgirl's Tag

2007-02-13T11:13:00.000-05:00

Tag....I'm It
I got tagged by Mindtwister, so here is the list of all lists....lol! Here's the deal, all the things in BOLD are what I have done. At the end I'm going to tag a few of you guys so you have to copy and paste the list, then put in bold the things you have done. Okay? Good. So here we go!!!

1. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
2. Swam with dolphins (i wanna do this soooooo BAD)
3. Climbed a mountain
4. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
5. Been inside the Great Pyramid
6. Held a tarantula
7. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
8. Said “I love you” and meant it
9. Hugged a tree I'm a tree hugger :)
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea well it was actually from the shore.
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby’s diaper (If I had a nickle for every diaper I'd be rich)
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on the winning horse (being from Kentucky I've bet on MANY winning horses)
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight (I'd love to have another but it's barely snowed here)
31.Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster (puked on a roller coaster too)
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39.Had two hard drives for your computer.
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was shit faced
42. Had an amazing friend
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched wild whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them.
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero; still do.......SuperMom to save the day!
58. Sung karaoke (every chance I get)
59. Lounged around in bed all day (it's been a LONG time since I did that)
60. Posed nude in front of strangers (I'm a flasher.....LOL)
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest ( I was a devil.....imagine that LOL)
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice (NOT the real venice but in VEGAS Baby)
80. Gotten a tattoo (another Vegas happening)
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an expert
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Eaten fugu (pufferfish)
89. Had a one-night stand
90. Gone to Thailand
91. Bought a house
92. Been in a combat zone
93. Buried one/both of your parents
94. Been on a cruise ship
95. Spoken more than one language fluently
96. Performed in Rocky Horror Picture Show
97. Raised children hardest job I've ever loved.
98. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery (No, but I need to....sniff sniff)
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds (working on it)
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Petted a stingray
110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Ridden a bike
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat (is that legal???)
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the paper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Petted a cockroach ARE YOU FRIGGIN' KIDDING?
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad and The Odyssey
135. Selected one important author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair (19 different colors in a year)
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident
150. Saved someone’s life

I tag Hard2Stop and Mustang Scarlett.

My Birthday!

2007-02-13T01:09:00.000-05:00

Well, Saturday was my birthday. Redneckgirl had been going on for weeks about how she had special plans for me, and wouldn't tell me what they were. Obviously, she wanted it to be a surprise, and it most certainly was.

We got up fairly early and cleaned up a bit around the house. Then before long, she had asked me to go on a doughnut run for us all. While I was away, she had fixed my gifts up and signed my cards.

I came back and she gave me my gifts, which was a card, a pair of house slippers, a teddy bear, and 3 DVD's.

I loved the gifts from her and I was wearing the house slippers for quite some time there.

We kinda napped for part of the afternoon, then we got up and got ready, and she took me to Mark's Feed Store. They have some really, and I mean really great barbecue sandwiches.

After eating, she sprung one of my surprises on me...she was taking me to the circus.

This was a big deal for me because I had never been to a circus before, so naturally I was excited!

I have to say that it was amazing! I don't know what one should expect, but it was thrilling, funny, and awe inspiring all at the same time.

Once again, the Love of My Life has done something to make some of my dreams come true.

After the circus we went home and watched TV together and ended up falling asleep together.

The crazy part is after all that, it apparently isn't over yet. She has something cooking up in that sexy mind of hers for Friday, and then Saturday we get to go out for my birthday celebration with our friends, and I get to choose what we are doing.

I also still get whatever bithday stuff comes from my family, as both my sisters and my mom called, but I haven't seen them in awhile.

I have to say that even though I'm 34 years old now, I feel like a kid again!

As always, I'll let you all know how this weekend goes, and what else my birthday festivities have in store.

Tag....I'm It

2007-02-13T00:28:00.000-05:00

I got tagged by Pinky, so here is the list of all lists....lol!

Here's the deal, all the things in BOLD are what I have done. At the end I'm going to tag a few of you guys so you have to copy and paste the list, then put in bold the things you have done. Okay? Good. So here we go!!!

1. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
2. Swam with dolphins
3. Climbed a mountain
4. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
5. Been inside the Great Pyramid
6. Held a tarantula
7. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
8. Said “I love you” and meant it
9. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31.Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39.Had two hard drives for your computer.
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was shit faced
42. Had an amazing friend
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched wild whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger's table and had a meal with them.
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Posed nude in front of strangers Not posed so much as stripped...lol!
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theater
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on television news programs as an expert
83. Got flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Eaten fugu (pufferfish)
89. Had a one-night stand
90. Gone to Thailand
91. Bought a house
92. Been in a combat zone
93. Buried one/both of your parents
94. Been on a cruise ship
95. Spoken more than one language fluently
96. Performed in Rocky Horror Picture Show
97. Raised children
98. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Petted a stingray
110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Ridden a bike
112. Won money on a T.V. game show
113. Broken a bone ( I didn't break it, but I had it broken for me during a surgery.)
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat (is that legal???)
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the paper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Petted a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad and The Odyssey
135. Selected one important author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident
150. Saved someone’s life

I'm not sure who to tag, so I choose Redneckgirl, Rach, and Ms.L

Happy Birthday Mindtwister!!!!!

2007-02-12T10:37:00.000-05:00

Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday dear Mindtwister Happy Birthday to you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All My Love,
Your RedNeckGirl

Bloody Hell!

2007-02-06T23:36:00.000-05:00

As you all know, I have been sick for awhile.

I had some really funky virus or something, and it's still trying to take over....definitely a very aggressive fucker!

It all started Wednesday night when I was working. I started to feel those body aches always assocoated with the flu, and my balance became messed up a little. Then I started to get really hot, and my body went into that state of mind where you know you're sick, and nothing else matters.

I went home early and was about to rest when I got really hungry. I ended up gorging myself. I ate soo much that night it wasn't even funny. I was probably eating constantly for over 2 hours. Sandwiches, chips and dip, more sandwiches, candy, and more chips.

Finally, I was able to go to sleep.

Thursday morning I wake up and immediately wish I didn't. I could feel the aches in me, my head hurt, and fever had broken out. This was not gonna be good. I laid around the house most of the day and called into work for that. I went to the pizza place where redneckgirl works and she made me some potato soup and a half a loaf of garlic bread. That was actually the best part of Thursday. I went home and tried to sleep, but couldn't. redneckgirl came by after she finished working and she had lots of drugs for me. She got me Ibuprofen, Theraflu daytime tablets, Cold-eeze zinc drops, and her tired, yet smiling face.

She got me set up with the drugs and had me lay down. I think she was worried about my fever, and she wanted to get it down, so she stayed with me for awhile. She put a cold, wet rag on my forehead and did my dishes while I protested.

I was lying on the couch, trying to find the energy to move, but yelling to her not to do the dishes. She told me that I was in no state to be able to argue, and she was right.

I was able to finally get up, and I stumbled into the kitchen and immediately got the daggers from her eyes. "I thought I told you to stay lying down", she said.

I told her I didn't want her to do the dishes, and she made note of the fact that I could barely stand. I started to feel queasy so I started stumbling toward the bathroom.

I got in there and just sat on the edge of the tub, staring at the toilet, not wanting to get sick, but just knowing it was gonna happen.

She then came in again and told me that she thought I should go to the emergency room, and as usual, my stubborn ass says no.

She then tells me that she needs to find a way to lower my temperature, so she gives me a sponge bath.

I have to say that I always thought of sponge baths being a lot more erotic, and probably warm too, but not this one. The water felt like ice needles on my skin, and I'm sure I was whining like a little bitch the whole time.

Then, she tucked me into bed and laid down with me for a few minutes, comforting me and telling me how much she loves me. Then she went home.

Friday morning I woke up and was feeling much better. I thought I might actually make it into work, but I was wrong again. Before I had to go in, fever broke again and I was back where I was the night before, only this time, redneckgirl wasn't there. She had gone out with hard2stop and I was laying around. Around about 1am, I decided to go to the emergency room, because enough had certainly been enough, but on the way there, I had gotten a message from redneckgirl that asked me to pick her and hard2stop up from the redneck bar because they had had a few and didn't wanna drive.

I changed course and went to pick them up, then dropped hard2stop off at home, and redneckgirl and I went back to my house and went to bed.

Saturday morning, I felt something different. It was a weird feeling that came directly after this hard and hacking cough I had developed in the night. It kinda felt like something was moving in my chest right beneath the skin. It's a very creepy feeling.

Redneckgirl and I got up and took her grandmother out to eat, then we went to the flea market at our local fairgrounds to look at stuff. After that I had to rush her back home so she could get ready for work.

After she got home, we went to see a movie in the theaters. It was an ok movie. we then went to steak and Shake and got some 5 way chili's to go. we took them back to my place and ate them. I was still feeling the effects of the hacking cough which had now turned into a wheezing cough, and most of the other symptoms were gone. We talked for awhile after eating, and then we went to bed.

Sunday morning came and we just laid around most of the day, enjoying each others company, and painfully plotting against the wheezy cough. Then she had to go pick up her children and she went home.

monday I caleld the doctor and they got me in in no time. They gave me 3 prescriptions and told me not to go in to work. So I didn't. I got those filled and waited around until they were ready, then went to see redneckgirl.

There are plenty more details but I think I've done enough typing today. I'm glad to be back on the road to good health now.

I wanna give a big thank you to everyone who wished me better soon. I also wanna say too bad to those who wish that I would have gotten worse....lmao!

It's good to be back at work now, and better to be back to the blog. I'm off for a dose of my meds to help fight this alien thing in my chest!

Rants courtesy of RedNeckGirl

2007-02-05T10:28:00.000-05:00

Mindtwister is ill and hasn't been at work or able to blog for a while........but I expect him back tonight or tomorrow :) I wanna tell him to get better soon and thank him for letting me guest blog here @ Rants About it All.

So here it is......I have two Rants....oh yeah only been gone from the blog scene for a little over a week and I already have two rants. First off.....I was told Friday that they are moving my son from the class he's in back to the one that he hated (and cried everyday when I took him). The teacher that told me is NOT his regular teacher and when I spoke to his teacher today she said that the other girl wasn't supposed to tell me; the regular teachers are supposed to discuss that with the parents. She said that it's not set in stone and they don't know when the move will happen. I told her that we could try it but that I am apprehensive because that class isn't as structured as his class and he does MUCH better in a structured environment and with a strict schedule. Friday I was really upset and spent all weekend thinking about the move and what it will possibly mean for my son. Today I feel a little better because I get the feeling that his teacher will try her best to keep him in her class.....and that's all I can ask of her.

My second rant is actually the second part of a previous rant...confusing but true. Some of you may remember my post titled at odds....where I discussed a few members of my family attacked my parenting and made me feel as if my children were bad etc. Well I find out last night that there was more said than I originally knew........one member of my family actually accused me and my ex of letting other people raise our children.....this angers me on so many levels....first of all it was said behind my back so I couldn't even defend myself and secondly this person is hardly ever around.....how can he judge me? I see him for a few hours every couple of months and IF we actually talk....it's about superficial bullshit nothing of real substance.......he doesn't know me, my situation, or my kids. I have to remind my youngest son what this persons name is......so that should tell you how often we see him. Before my kids were in school/daycare my sister kept them while I worked. She was in college and needed the money and I HAD to work (if I could afford to be a stay @ home mom I would) I needed a sitter that I could trust. She is very close to my kids by choice not because I push them off on her.......my sister and I have always been close.....we've been through a lot together and I've always tried to help her and be there for her whenever I can and she does the same for my kids. I appreciate everything she and my parents have done for me but they have NOT raised my kids......my ex and I have......we are their parents and anyone that really knows me, knows the kind of mother I am and what my children mean to me. I know I shouldn't let what this person said get to me.....I am better than that.....but I used to really look up to him; so I guess neither of us REALLY knows the other......and now....it will stay that way.

In closing.....thanks for reading sorry to b*tch so much but I do feel better now.

Hugs and Love,
Brandy

Redneckgirl Update!

2007-01-31T00:03:00.000-05:00

I have decided that as much as she wants, redneckgirl can post here whenever she wants. I think she likes this idea, although it may take awhile for her to actually do it once.

So be on the lookout for a redneckgirl update right here!

Requiem For A Blog

2007-01-29T21:40:00.000-05:00

As you all know, redneckgirl posted her last post today. I can't really go into details as to why, but I will go as far to say that even though I don't really agree with it, I am standing by her and supporting her decision to stop the blogging.

I guess the reason I am against it like I am is that she had put so much of herself into it, got to vent her frustrations about me, her own issues, her relationship with her ex, and so much more.

In the process, you all came to know the woman I know in some semblance. You have been able to watch her and her wonderful children develop over the short time that she has done this.

You've been able to see her brag on her children, and laugh at the things they say, as well as watch the relationship that she has with me blossom into something much more.

You've been able to see what a wonderful person and mother she is, and how beautiful she is as well. You've been able to laugh with her, and worry with her, and sometimes cry with her.

Regardless of how much time goes by, her readers will always remain in her heart and on her mind. You have all shown her, and myself that there are great people out there who want nothing more than a friendship and some great conversation. I know I have been converted from the way I used to think, and it's mostly due to her.

I know her reasons, explicitly. I understand the reasons why she feels she has to do this. Believe me when I tell you she doesn't want to stop blogging, but "feels" as though it is the thing to do right now.

I know that even though it's been a brief time in the blogging community, that redneckgirl has touched your lives and your hearts.

A lot of what has been said here was already said on her blog. After actually talking to her and seeing her today, I felt compelled to post this as a sign of love to her, and as a moment of retrospect to her blog.

It's a shame to see such a lovely and wonderful and caring person silenced as she has been for now.

we can all hope and pray that she decides to start blogging again, sooner than later.

The video here kind of reminds me of how she is with every aspect of her life. It doesn't matter if it's trying to keep me on the straight and narrow, or teaching the values of life to her children. It describes how we should all be in our lives, or at least try to be.

These are Just My Thoughts.

Just remember redneckgirl, you "can" choose to start this again anytime you want. we don't want you to stay away for good. I Love You.

The Lazy Eye

2007-01-26T01:41:00.000-05:00

I don't know if this is gonna be funny or just plain dumb, but I owe you guys and gals something more than I've been posting, so here goes.

I have heard the term lazy eye on many occasions. I know what it means. However, some twisted part of my mind animates it and I get a visual that resembles a husband and wife arguing.

I figure if you have a lazy eye, then the other eye must do all the work and bring home the bacon, so to speak.

What if the working eye gets pissed at the lazy eye and starts yelling at it to get a job and stop being such a bum.

If the lazy eye didn't shape up, would the working eye kick it out of the socket?

I dunno, it seemed funnier earlier, but that could have been in my head....lol!

Hinder - Better Than Me

2007-01-26T01:30:00.000-05:00

This song reminds me of redneckgirl, especially the times we couldn't be together for whatever reasons. I spent what would seem like an eternity without her, and all the time, I was hoping she was happy.

Who would have thought that a guy like me could make her as happy as she is now.

I love you with all my heart Brandy, so I'm posting this for you.

I think you can do much better than me
After all the lies that I made you believe
Guilt kicks in and I start to see
The edge of the bed
Where your nightgown used to be
I told myself I won't miss you
But I remembered
What it feels like beside you

I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me

While looking through your old box of notes
I found those pictures i took
That you were looking for
If there's one memory I don't want to lose
That time at the mall
You and me in the dressing room
I told myself I won't miss you
But I remembered
What it feels like beside you

I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me

The bed I'm lying in is getting colder
Wish I never would've said it's over
And I can't pretend I won't think about you when I'm older
Cause we never really had our closure
This can't be the end

I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me
I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me
(And I think you should know this)
(You deserve much better than me)
(And I think you should know this)
(You deserve much better than me)
(And I think you should know this)
(You deserve much better than me)
(And I think you should know this)
(You deserve much better than me)

Not Even Gonna Say!!!!!!

2007-01-20T01:33:00.000-05:00

I'm not even gonna say what this looks like! Do I really have to? I mean, you can use your imagination...hell, you really don't even have to do that....LMAO!

I think I'm going to hell for this one....lol!

It's A Train Wreck

2007-01-18T00:32:00.000-05:00

What the hell is up with train wrecks in Kentucky?

Here it is now we've had not 1, not 2, but 3 train wrecks this week in this state!

The first was on Monday when runaway railcars struck two parked locomotives in eastern Kentucky, the second was on Tuesday when a train derailed and caught fire, causing evacuation of quite a bit of places near where I work, and the third was on Wednesday, when a train collided with a truck crossing the tracks, killing the 2 passengers and causing the truck to burst into flames.

I just can't understand some of this. I guess I'm not supposed to.

With that said, if you ever come to Kentucky for a visit, stay away from the tracks!

Wonka's Jizz Balls

2007-01-10T23:59:00.000-05:00

I know, you think it sounds gross, but this is what we call these at work.

It all started when one of the guys here brought in some truffles. we engaged in a conversation about which ones were better when one of them just broke out with "The white chocolate ones are like Willy Wonka descended from the heavens himself and bust a nut in your mouth!"

I was on the floor laughing my butt off because I thought it was just soo funny.

Tonight, I had another truffle experience. I brought a bag of mine in (I got like 4 or 5 bags for Christmas), and I let one of the other guys try one of them. He came back later and told me that the Wonka's Jizz Balls were the best ever.

I have to agree, and with that, I now change the name from Lindor White Chocolate Truffles to Wonka's Jizz Balls.

For My Redneckgirl

2007-01-09T00:35:00.000-05:00

It's been awhile since I have posted something specifically for you. I think this song reminds me of us a lot, especially in the beginning.

Let me say that I'm very happy we gave in to one another, because you make me happier than I have ever been. I can see that ours is going to be a beautiful relationship and I'm so happy that I have you in my life.

I Love You!

Tearing Me Apart!!

2007-01-04T01:14:00.000-05:00

At least it feels like that's what the dentist did.

I promised an update on this, so here you all go.

I went on Thursday to have my 2 root canals done. After about 2 to 3 hours, we had come to s stopping point because he had gotten them mostly done, but the giudes that he put in to measure how much more to do kept changing with every xray.

To elaborate: He had these tiny things that looked like needles, but a little thicker, and with measurements on them. He put these inside the hollowed out teeth to see if there was any more nerve he had to get out. Every single time that measurment would change.

Every time, and I mean every single time he would move those measures, I could feel it inside my brain. It really hurt bad. Needless to say, I was exhausted!

So, he sent me home after patching up the hollow teeth with cotton stuffing and a temporary filling.

Friday morning, I go in at 10am, and we proceed to get the root canals done. More brain poking led to more pain, which led to a migraine before they were finished.

After all was said and done, we were finished completely with the root canals, and with the posts for the crowns at about 1pm. Now time for the fun part.

If you'll remember, I also had to have 3 extractions that day.

God as my witness, I've never seen a set of teeth that didn't wanna come out.

The first one was the hardest because it was a fighter. It came out in 4 pieces and hurt the whole time. The other two on the bottom was just as bad. They came out in multiple pieces too.

I think a big factor was that I seemed to be building an immunity to novacaine. It took a lot more than it normally does to numb me. I think all day Friday I had in between 20 and 25 shots of novacaine to try to numb me. In between extractions he asked if I wanted to take a break, and I said no...just kill me and get it over with.

By the end of the day Friday, I was seriously worn out, and I was feeling very needy, so I didn't go home. I went to spend time with the Love of My Life, and get comfort from her. She did as best she could, as she was battling a very nasty stomach virus at the time, but she gave me everything she possibly could.

But the fun with my teeth didn't end there.

Saturday morning I woke up to a terrible pain. I went and looked and it looked as though one of the bottom teeth had not been removed. There was a bone fragment in there that was almost as big as one of the teeth itself.

Me, being sadistic with my teeth, started trying to pry it out. I used my fingers to no avail. I used a butter knife, and that didn't help either. I was bleeding like crazy, but this thing hurt and all I could think was how much I wanted it out. But it wouldn't come out.

Luckily, I had some meds and started taking them anytime I felt a little pain. I went through the rest of the weekend and New Years Day with that fragment in my mouth.

Then Tuesday, I went back into the office and he removed that damn fragment. He also applied some kind of medicine insides the holes because apparently, I had developed a dry socket as well. Not something I would recommend to anyone!

Now, I leave and go back home to get ready for work. However, I would be home tonight too.

I ate some mashed potatoes, which tasted good, but then not good because of the meds inside the tooth. I got a migraine and instantly started feeling queasy. I Got in the truck and tried making it to work. Well before I got there, I had to pull over and get sick. Between the migraine and throwing up roadside, I decided to call in. I went home and went to bed, but couldn't get any restful sleep because of the migraine.

After many hours, and much ibuprofen, the migraine went away. I ate crackers for the rest of the night, just in case I did get sick again, and I think I finally got a restful sleep afterwards.

So, as the title of this post states, you can understand how I was feeling these days, and how thankful I am that they are finished with for now.

As far as the rest of the work, I have a long way to go.

I have 7, yes 7 more root canals left to do, 1 cavity filling, 9 crowns, and 3 teeth yet that are unknown as to what we do to them. Then I have to get my partial made.

It's going to be a long year as far as dentistry goes, but I have to do it. No more eating in pain for me.

Wish me luck, and I hope none of you have to endure as much as I did on Friday.

I Have Returned!

2006-12-27T01:32:00.000-05:00

I know, I know!

I've been out for a very long time.

It's not really my fault....lol, but then again, I guess it is :)

The next few days will be a recap of everything that has been going on.

I have been on vacation since December 15th! 11 glorious days and nights next to the love of my life, and almost no tech support. I loved that.

Actually, I was sick on Dec. 15th. I was planning on posting a few more Christmas posts, but that didn't happen. I got one of my migraines again and it kept me from work.

So, even though it's late, I wanna wish you all a Merry Christmas. I hope everyone got into the spirit and got everything you wanted!

I'll be posting more very soon....count on it!

Christmas Spirit

2006-12-14T01:08:00.000-05:00

Seeing as it's getting close to Christmas, I think some holiday cheer would be in order. With that, I present Weird Al with "Christmas at Ground Zero." Hope you all enjoy :)

As a side note, After Friday, I will be on vacation until December 26th, so no work for me, which unfortunately means no internet either. I'll come by and blog if I get the opportunity, but nothing is set in stone.

Hope you all have a wonderful day!

It's Time...

2006-12-12T02:00:00.000-05:00

It is now time for me to do something about my teeth. They have finally gotten to a point that I can't stand it anymore, and I'm going to have the work done.

As you all know from a previous post, I have very bad teeth. Some of it is from accidents, bad dental work, being kicked in the face, and general apathy sometimes.

I went to the dentist on Friday, and we spent 4 hours going over my options as far as what I can do, and the long term effects of each option.

I have decided that instead of getting them all pulled and getting a plate, I am going to try to save what I can, and work started on Friday.

I went in and he pulled on of my major problem teeth.

I am currently writing this while on hydrocodone ;)

If anyone has read the last post about this, you'll know that I don't smile big because I am ashamed of what the inside of my mouth looks like. I hated showing anyone that, and as compensation to that, I learned to hide it. People could talk to me face to face and not know I was missing so many, or that it was so bad, and especially of how much it hurt....and let me tell you....it "always" hurts.

My dentist has quoted me at $13,000 to completely overhaul my mouth. My insiurance is going to pay for a small portion of that, but nowhere near enough.

I am going to keep you all up to date on what's happening and how it all goes.

My next 2 appointments are on December 28th and 29th.

On the 28th, I get to have 2 root canals back to back, and on the 29th, I get 3 more teeth extracted.

Needless to say, I think I'm gonna be in a lot of pain come New Years Eve, but I'll be celebrating with redneckgirl, so it won't be bad at all :)

Workin' The Tree

2006-12-12T00:02:00.002-05:00

Over the weekend. redneckgirl, hard2stop, and I worked the Angel Tree at one of our local malls. For those not familiar with this, we set up 4 tables with the names of children who are needy this holiday season. Then when people approach, we ask them if they would like to adopt an angel. If they say yes, then we try and help them select a name from the table. When they select a name, we get them to sign up and give them the angel and the bag that comes with it. Then they shop for things the children want or need and bring it back. We then check it in and sign them off of the list. They can take their angel ornament home and hang it on their tree, or leave it hanging on the angel tree.

We put in 4 hours there, and I must say it has done something tremendoous to me. Before going in, I was, and have always been under the assumption that most people have no kindness, nothing to give, and definitely not a charitable nature to them. I was proven wrong.

The masses of people who came out to help were astounding. My outlook on humans and humanity have changed drastically. I have seen something I had never seen before in others.

Actually, I have been seeing that more this year than any, with redneckgirl's kind heart and her eyes and just her nature. She is the embodiment of charity and she isn't afraid to show it.

I have seen it in hard2stop, who took me into her home and gave me a place to stay.

I have seen it in many of my blogger friends, who have been very kind to me, supportive and encouraging.

And I saw it in droves on Saturday. I can honestly say that people are not as bad as I had thought, and I'm extremely happy I was wrong.

After we worked the Angel Tree, redneckgirl and I picked out a special little angel and we spent about $50 on her for some toys, clothes, and a coat.

Hard2stop picked out one for her, and one for her mother, and did the shopping for the both of them.

I know for a fact that we'll be doing this again next year. Both the working and the shopping, but hopefully more children. This is exactly what I needed to fill me with the Christmas Spirit and to make me feel more human than I have in a long time.

I encourage everyone to go out and do this next year. Trust me, it is a wonderful feeling to do this, and to know that you have made a difference in someone else's life :)

My Absence

2006-12-05T01:14:00.000-05:00

As many of you, my faithful readers know, I have not blogged in some time.

I am sorry for being away for so long, but it has been really hectic at work, as the network engineers keep finding ways to mess things up.

Also, I have been a bit in a bad way with my attitude and haven't really felt like doing the blog thing because of it.

I have been cranky, rebellious and just downright a pain in the ass to be around. It has a lot to do with me not having my Christmas shopping even started yet, and the fact I have no money to repair my truck, which continues to malfunction on a more frequent basis. For the record, it now drinks gas like a hobo drinks wine, and it has no heat.

Anywho, I just wanted everyone to know why I haven't been around. I have also started my Christmas shopping now too.....Yay!!!!

Happy Belated Thanksgiving to all, and I know....I owe you guys some big hair Fridays!

Hope you all have a wonderful evening!

Holiday Style

2006-12-05T00:57:00.000-05:00

Stole this from my beloved redneckgirl! I liked it and wanted to share :)

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate? Egg Nog

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree? He wraps them bad boys up!

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? Usually colored, but I have a feeling I'm about to be involved in both next year ;)

4. Do you hang mistletoe? Not in my family....lol!

5. When do you put up your decorations? In my family, I was sometime in mid December. Now, the day after Thanksgiving.

6. What is your favorite holiday dish? My mom's ham!

7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child? Wishing for Star Wars figures at a fountain during a trip to see Santa, and waking up Christmas morning to find my wish come true!

8. When and how did you learn that Santa isn't real? This is a bad one. I found out when I was about 8, maybe 7. I had gotten the lame excuse for a stepfather (not anymore...the one I have now is much, much better) angry, so he took me in the bedroom where they had the presents covered with a sheet and removed it and told me that there was no Santa, and that he was taking all of the gifts back to the store.

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? We always opened 1 right before bed.

10. How do you decorate your Christmas Tree? With colored lights and lots of ornaments and lots of those silver icicles and tinsel!

11. Snow! Love it or Dread it? Love it when it's not making me freeze.

12. Can you ice skate? Somewhat....lol.

13. Do you remember your favorite gift? The Star Wars figures when I was little.

14. What's the most important thing about the Holidays for you? Being with family and friends

15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert? The Rocky Road candy my grandmother used to make.....mmmmm!

16. What is your favorite holiday tradition? Driving around looking at the lights while listening to Christmas music.

17. What tops your tree? a star

18. Which do you prefer giving or Receiving gifts? Both!!!!

19. What is your favorite Christmas Song? Do You Hear What I Hear

20. Candy Canes on the tree? Yes, and when I actually didn't have issues with my teeth, it was hell keeping me away from them!

Our Weekend

2006-11-22T02:42:00.000-05:00

As you all know, Saturday redneckgirl and I went to see Gary Allan in concert.

The concert was amazing. The place he played at was like no concert hall I'd ever been to before. It was a smaller venue, kinda like a place that they could hold an exhibition at the fair.

We got a fairly good view of the stage for most of the show.

The opening act was this 14 year old girl who was belting out the songs. She was really good, especially with her rendition of "Before He Cheats". See redneckgirl's blog to hear the song.

Then, Gary Allan came out and sang mostly every song I wanted to hear.

It was a great concert not only because of the music, but because redneckgirl and I were together, singing along to all our favorite songs.

The last song he sang was "Life Ain't Always Beautiful". During this song, redneckgirl and I danced and near the end of the song, I asked her if we could make our relationship official, and she said yes :D

This, of course, was the absolute best part of the concert!

Finally the Love of My Life and I are officially a couple. I can't say how long I have been wishing and wanting this to happen. I feel like a kid in a candy shop, but better!!!

I'm gonna end this post now before my big cheesy grin spills over into the post.

You guys and gals have a wonderful evening, and a Happy Thanksgiving as well :)

Raccoon!!!!!

2006-11-18T01:43:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I was at work, and I went on break and called redneckgirl, as I normally do.

I'm outside walking around the parking lot, talking to her, and suddenly something catches my eye, but I don't look up.

I assume it's a cat or a dog because it's so close to me, and when I do look, I realize that it's a raccoon!

I then try to coax the coon over to me (I know they are filthy and carry rabies, but they are cute).

It runs under someones van, and when it thinks I'm gone, it comes out and goes to one of our trash cans and starts trying to knock it over with its 2 front paws.

I'm standing maybe 5 feet away at this time, so I start trying to call it again, because I wanna pet it.

It sees me again, and takes off through the parking lot, around and under various cars with me in tow all the way.

Finally, my newfound friend crawls into the sewer, a place he surely knows I can't follow.

This is the closest I've ever been to a raccoon before, and especially in the kind of surrounding I was in at work.

It was funny and strange, and now every time I go out to the parking lot, I always am on the lookout for him.

The Weekend

2006-11-18T01:41:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm outta here for the weekend.

I'll be doing the Gary Allan thing this weekend, and hopefully I'll be posting pics for y'all to see when I get back.

Wait, you know what...I have one thing to tell you guys before I go....in the post above :)

Another One For Redneckgirl

2006-11-18T01:39:00.000-05:00

This song reminds me of the time we had to spend apart. It tells of the way I felt than, and I think it conveys that I wouldn't change anything about the way everything has happened. I Love You Brandy.

Big Hair Friday Again!!

2006-11-17T02:38:00.000-05:00

This one is for this week :)

Big Hair Friday!!

2006-11-17T01:36:00.000-05:00

This is for missing it last week. I have to make it all up to you guys :)

WTF!!!!

2006-11-15T20:39:00.000-05:00

All I can say is what the hell is wrong in this world when a 7 year old pulls a knife on someone.

Largo, Florida - Largo Police are looking for a little girl who pulled a knife on a Wal-Mart clerk as she tried to steal two boxes of Lego toy blocks.

It happened on the Missouri Avenue around 9:00 pm Tuesday night.

Police say the 7 to 8-year-old girl hid the toys under her coat and tried to walk out the door.

A store employee was watching and approached the child, asking her to turn over the Lego blocks.

Police say the little girl then opened her jacket and displayed a combo carving knife with a forked point and a 10" blade, saying she was armed for protection.

The employee talked the girl into putting down the knife and the toys.

The girl then rode away on her bicycle.

The employee was not hurt.

She's Everything

2006-11-14T01:21:00.000-05:00

This song describes the way I see redneckgirl. I can't help but think of her every time it plays, and if I'm not with her, I start missing her more than I already was.

This song is for you redneckgirl. I Love You :)

P.S. This was the best video I could find, so pay no attention to the animation....lol!

4 Days To Gary Allan!!

2006-11-14T01:18:00.000-05:00

Wooo Hooo!

I can't wait! I have been trying to see Gary Allan in concert for 4 years now, and every time he comes to town, I'm always at work.

Come Saturday, redneckgirl and I are driving to Owensboro to see him perform.

So not only do I get to see my all time favorite country singer, I get to do it with the woman who inspires me to be better than what I am, and the woman I love with all of my heart.

Hope you all have a great night :)

The New Hotness!

2006-11-11T00:42:00.000-05:00

As you all know, I was going out to get redneckgirl and myself new phones. I wanted to update you on how that went, and show the pics of our new fantastic phones :)

This pink one is hers, because she loves the color pink, and it looks sooo good on her!

This one is mine. A basic silver one, but awesome nevertheless.

Hope your day is going well. I'll visit you all very soon again :)

Saying Goodbye To The Old

2006-11-10T02:12:00.000-05:00

This here is the Motorola V276 cell phone. It may look pretty, but don't be fooled by the pretty exterior. Why, you say?

Simply put.....this phone is the biggest piece of shit Motorola ever took in a day.

Both redneckgirl and I have this exact model cell phone, and let me tell you, I was not biased by making the above statement.

I am getting 2 new phones for us today. Mainly because the ones we have now are so much crap.

Mine has already been replaced twice since August. I've not even been with Verizon for a year yet and I've already had to have my phone replaced twice, and now today makes 3.

Good thing is that I am getting a new phone of another model. If it goes the way I think it is, I'll be getting a Motorola V325 phone. If it goes how I hope, I get the Motorola Razr.

Redneckgirl is also getting a new phone. I'm picking her up a pink Motorola Razr.

The above phones have so many problems with the batteries and keeping a charge and dropping not only service, but also power to the phone that it is really ridiculous.

Redneckgirl's phone can't even charge a battery. We meet up at least once a day to swap batteries so she can have a fresh one and I can charge up the other.

Let me just say that it is a major headache to deal with these phones and their shoddy designs.

With that, I'm saying goodbye to this old phone, and HELLO!!!! to the new ones :)

Toe Socks And Flip Flops!!

2006-11-10T01:04:00.000-05:00

These are the sexy feet of Redneckgirl in her cute lil toe socks :)

We went to get sodas during my lunch break tonight and she wore these and her flip flops. She really does have a thing for those flip flops, and with feet as sexy as hers, I can't say I blame her.

A closeup of both in hardcore foot action.....lol!!!

Last pic of the feets for tonight.

I just thought it was cute how she looked with them on, so I thought I'd share with you guys and gals.

Now, in other news, I'm sure you all read about our weekend at the bar, and how nothing happened there. However, drama did happen the next day. Visit my friend hard2stop's blog to read the juicy details.

As a side note, I have not responded yet to certain things because I want to be able to say what I want to say without my anger making me get carried away, but I DO plan on responding to this >:)

Hope you guys have a great night, and I'll try to actually post Big Hair Friday today.

To My Lovely Redneckgirl

2006-11-08T01:45:00.000-05:00

I just wanted to post tonihgt and tell you how beautiful I think you are. I want you to know that you mean everything in the world to me, and that I would gladly lay my own wants aside to give you what you want.

My desire for you burns so intensely that sometimes I think it could consume me. I want you more than anyone I have ever wanted, and I love that feeling. I can't get enough of you.

If I were to die tomorrow, and have but one last request, it would be to look once again into those beautiful eyes. So filled with intrigue and emotion and love. The eyes of a wonderful mother, an amazing friend, and a gorgeous partner and lover.

I tell you I love you every day. However, the words I love you are hardly enough to convey my true feelings for you. I can't think of a string of words that can describe that as passionately as I would like to, or as much as I feel it.

Even though this whole post is cliche, it is the best way I know to tell you how I feel. I am incomplete without you, just an empty and hollow shell of a person.

You taught me so much in our time together. I learned I could love again, more than I had even imagined. I learned I had the capability to care for others. I learned to truly laugh again, and I remember how wonderful that feels.

I imagine throughout the rest of our lives that I will learn so much more from you as well, and I am looking forward to it.

I'm saying here and now that I want to spend the rest of my life with you if and whenever you are ready, and that you are the only woman I ever want or need.

I Love You.....so much more than I could ever say.

Important Lessons Learned From 80's Cartoons

2006-11-08T01:20:00.000-05:00

I stole this from another website because I thought it was so damn funny. I hope you guys and gals enjoy ;)

CARTOON: The Smurfs
LESSON: Communism works!
For naysayers who point to the Former Soviet Union as proof that communism is inherently flawed, may we merely direct your attention to Smurf Village, where everyone shares everything, wears similar utilitarian clothing, battles Gargamel and his turn-Smurfs-to-gold get rich quick schemes and obeys the dictates of a bearded, red hat-wearing, benevolent authority figure. Quoth Comrade Papa: “From each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs.” Really, he actually said that.
How it affected us as adults: Secret communist agendas ceased being dangerous, or really any adjective of consequence, years ago. The worst thing communism does these days is make Ivy League students waste a couple of years wearing ugly clothes and attending boring meetings. However, the sexual politics of Smurf Village, with its one female for every 30 guys, did go a long way towards preparing us for freshman year of college.

CARTOON: Popeye
LESSON: Spinach is good for you.
Sure, it doesn’t taste as good as candy, ice cream or opium, but it’s full of essential vitamins and minerals that’ll make your muscles explode like battleship cannons. If you want to triumph over the bullying Blutos of the world and win the affections of your own lovely, leggy Olive Oyl, pound a can of spinach at least once a day. Or put it in your corncob pipe and smoke it, like everybody’s favorite ornery, mumbling sailorman. Toot toot!
How it affected us as adults: You only need to look at the steroid scandal rocking Major League Baseball to see that Popeye raised a generation that is willing to use performance enhancers. Also, it should be pointed out that Olive Oyl was the first anorexic sex symbol.

CARTOON: G.I. Joe
LESSON: Knowing is half the battle.
The other half of the battle is kicking Cobra’s terrorist ass. And with the coolest soldier codenames ever --Snake Eyes, Duke, Lady Jaye, Shipwreck-- winning the war on terror should be no problem. Good will always win out over evil, because good guys work together (Team Work! Cooperation!), while bad guys are ruthless cowards who turn tail and run whenever G.I. Joe’s laser guns get to zappin’. As Sergeant Slaughter once said: “Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people and neither do we.”
Now that’s some good strategery.
How it affected us as adults: Actually, we’re pretty certain that our strategy for the Iraq War was conceived after a two day long G.I. Joe marathon in the Pentagon. They just implicitly trusted that the good guys were going to win, that firing off our guns would make the bad guys run for the caves and that giving everyone cute nicknames was somehow endearing. When things didn’t turn out the way they’d planned, the administration placed the blame on faulty intelligence, or in other words: “Knowing is half the battle, and we unfortunately didn’t know shit.”

CARTOON: Scooby Doo
LESSON: Trust no one.
Those phantoms in the fog are actually malevolent hicks, dressed up as ghosts to scare you off their spooky farm. That monster hiding in the attic is actually old man McGee, trying to find the treasure buried in the floorboards. And that happy-go-lucky frat boy, Fred, is actually a bloodthirsty killer. Don’t turn your back on him. Or the girls. Or your dog
…Or maybe we’ve just been spending too much time in the Mystery Machine, and got a little contact high paranoia. Hey, it happens. You want a Scooby Snack? Yeah, it is dog food. So what? You’re really harshing my mellow man. What are you, a narc?
How it affected us as adults: We can’t be certain, but it would appear that our habit of, upon being dumped, grabbing hold of our ex-girlfriends’ chin and yanking upward, started with this show.

CARTOON: He-Man
LESSON: It’s OK to be gay.
Look at this guy: golden locks cut in a tasteful bob, buff biceps, tanned, toned, hairless torso, a magic sword and most importantly, fabulous powers. What’s more, He-Man invites his handsome friends, the Masters of the Universe, to come hang out in his castle anytime. Of course Skeletor and his fugly cohorts are never allowed access to the secrets of He-Man’s dark, dry palace.
Yes, we had He-Man> toys, like Ram-Man, Trap-Jaw and even Castle Grayskull. We also had a favorite pair of tighty whiteys that had He-Man on one cheek and Skeletor on the other, battling over our asshole. But did merely owning and wearing that underwear make us gay?
How it affected us as adults: As regards the above question, it’s a very complex matter, but in a word: yes. (For more on depictions of homosexuality in '80s cartoons, please see Care Bears.)

CARTOON: Jem
LESSON: Grrrls rock!
OK, this was more our sister’s show, but we certainly watched it on more than one occasion, and learned that chicks with guitars and magic earrings kick ass. Jem is a sexy feminist living every young girl’s dream: music executive by day and rock star by night. She has it all: a bubblegum pop band called The Holograms, a boyfriend in love with both her and her alter ego and, for some reason, a foster home for orphans. In addition to teaching us how much grrrls rock, Jem also taught us that love triangles between only two people are often messy, confusing and potentially hilarious.
What? You’ve never seen Jem? Oh. Neither have we.
How it affected us as adults: Let’s just say the matching restraining orders filed against us by Debbie Gibson and Joan Jett didn’t happen on their own.

CARTOON: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
LESSON: April O’Neil is really hot.
She’s got red hair, wears a sexy yellow jumpsuit and gets down with anthropomorphic pizza-fiends. Most girls want nothing to do with dudes that live in the sewers, but not April O’Neil. She doesn’t even mind hanging with that old man-rat wearing a pink kimono! This girl is a freak, for real. I’ve got one word for you dude: cowabunga. Cowabunga that chick in your underground lair all night long.
How it affected us as adults: Mistakenly thought our girlfriend would be cool with it if we called them dude, ate nothing but pizza and wore a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle mask during sex.

CARTOON: Transformers
LESSON: If we’re not careful, robots will kill us all.
This is a humbling lesson for any child to learn, but an easy one to accept, considering Transformers was one of the coolest cartoons of the '80s. Would the Unabomber have renounced his violent ways if he were to witness the sheer stunning spectacle that is Grimlock? Hard to say, since he didn’t have a TV. But we will tell you one thing: when machines replace humans at the top of the food chain, we’ll be standing on the sidelines, waving our Autobot flag with fervent pride. Because, let’s face it, getting eaten by an alien car would suck.
How it affected us as adults: The reason we stay away from Priuses and make our TV wear a blindfold when we sleep at night.

Pissed On!

2006-11-07T00:38:00.000-05:00

Ah, I must tell you all about Saturday night. It really is a hoot, and I'm sure you all will get a kick out of the story.

I'm gonna fast forward to the fun part because we all know that's what everyone wants to read about, so here goes.

I pick redneckgirl up from work. We start to go to pick up Hard2stop.

We get to her house and go in. She's finishing getting ready to go, and kindly asks me if I could let the dogs out before we all go.

No problem.

Well, the bigger dog gives me no problems, and he is allowed to go where he wants, but the little one has to be put on a leash.

I pick her up and let the big dog out, and put the little one on her leash, but just before I hear the click, I feel a warmth down my side. It's cold outside so I know this warmth is not supposed to be there, and it's warmer than the doggy cradled on that very same side. I put her down and see that my shirt and pants are a darker shade of the color they had previously been.

That's right folks...I got pissed on by that little doggy.

Well, I couldn't go out Honky Tonkin like this!!!

We let the dogs back in, and I got the privilege of shutting the little doggy in her cage...hell, I'll say I enjoyed it....revenge for pissing on me and such.

We then had to go back to my place to change clothes.

I get there and hurry and change. Then we leave again and want to get some food.

We ate out Wendy's and pick up Mustangscarlett.

A side note here, I have left part of the story out here in between eating and picking up MS. I'm not sure how embarrassing it would be for redneckgirls aunt if I mentioned this here, so I'm not.

We go to the redneck bar, and start singing and dancing.

I actually have audio of redneckgirls performance, but I'm not gonna post it because it is very hard to hear, and you can hear more people than her at times.

I sang and danced a lot of dances with redneckgirl, and even gave Hard2stop a lap dance right there in the bar.

I don't know if she liked it or was freaked out, but she was laughing, and that was the important thing :)

After the bar, we went to Jerry's and had some breakfast.

Then I drove everyone home and I imagine we all went to bed.

I'm sure I've actually forgotten some things, but it's getting late and I am tired, so maybe redneckgirl and Hard2stop can fill in the blanks....lol

An Update!

2006-11-07T00:36:00.000-05:00

I'm sorry I haven't been posting much, but last week, I just wasn't feeling it.

As you can see, I have updated the links with some of my more recent commentors, so go pay them a visit and let em know how much you like their blogs.

I'll be posting more tonight, but just wanted to let you guys and gals know that I'm still here and all, but I just haven't had it in me to post.

A Great Halloween!

2006-10-31T19:56:00.000-05:00

I think that despite having to work, this Halloween is a great one for me.

I am sitting here in costume and typing to all my readers, letting you know the events of my life and pieces of my thoughts.

The above picture is my very first pumpkin carving. I had always had the opportunity to watch it being done, but never got to even help out as a kid.

Sunday night, I went to visit redneckgirl and she had me go pick up some pumpkins. I brought 3 back. She carved the first one, of which I have no picture.

The one above, if you look closely, is a mixed up pumpkin. Her oldest son wanted it to look this way, with one circular eye, one triangular eye, and the letter W for the nose.

I don't think I did too badly with it :)

This is me in my costume this year. Actually, the profile pic is the costume and this is what I really look like......no....seriously.....lol!

Another one of me in costume. For some reason, it looks like a mugshot photo ;)

Happy Halloween!!!

2006-10-31T18:01:00.000-05:00

Ah, Halloween! One of my favorite times of the year. I have always loved the scary aspect of Halloween and all the supernatural things that happen and especially the goings on and all the places that are supposed to be haunted that open for tours and such.

Above is a pic of one of my favorite scary attractions, Waverly Hills Sanitorium. Waverly is located right here in Louisville and sits atop a big hill. Just the approach to the building is intimidating. The building used to be a hospital for people with TB back when it was a really bad epidemic, and people say that if you were sent there, you were sent there to die.

No matter what others thought, many, many people died there before they were able to find a vaccine for TB.

They open the place up with a haunted house every year for Halloween and have guided tours all throughout the year.

I was going to this place since high school and it really is a creepy place at night, and especially unsupervised.

The picture above is yet another place that really intrigues me, called The Bell Witch Cave.

There is a local legend of a witch that had tortued a family for over 4 generations and ended up causing sickness and even death to the Bell family, whom the cave was named after, and the witch was known as the Bell Witch.

This cave is located near the Bell farm in Adams Tennessee. I hope to tour it one day.

I hope you all enjoyed these blurbs about these places. Google them if you wanna know more of their history, and feel free to let me know if you wanna talk about it, because I have a very strong fascination with both places.

Back With A Vengeance Part 4

2006-10-27T12:50:00.000-04:00

Back With A Vengeance Part 3

2006-10-27T00:49:00.000-04:00

Back With A Vengeance Part 2

2006-10-27T00:48:00.000-04:00

Back With A Vengeance...Big Hair Friday!!!

2006-10-27T00:47:00.000-04:00

Being busy and kind of in a funk lately, I have neglected my blog, and especially Big Hair Friday.

I'm making up for that now with not 1, not 2, not 3, but 4, that's right, 4 Big Hair Friday Videos.

I hope you all enjoy them.

Thanks goes out to redneckgirl for helping me choose once again :)

Blogger Is A Bitch Part 2

2006-10-26T17:49:00.000-04:00

Once again, blogger is being a whore.

I have tried to get to numerous blogs and cannot reach anyone who hasn't upgraded yet. I'm thinking that this is the way to muscle everyone over to blogger beta.

I apologize to anyone who hasn't gotten a comment from me today because of this.

I will continue throughout the night to try again to access your blogs.

Have a good night :)

For Redneckgirl

2006-10-26T13:37:00.000-04:00

I am feeling pretty good today, and I'm also feeling very romantic, so with that, I'm posting two videos here for redneckgirl today.

I love you with all my heart and soul. I am and will always be yours. I am picking these songs because they have a special place for us. Of course, all Gary Allan songs do really :)

Breathing Still

2006-10-26T01:42:00.000-04:00

I'm still around. I just haven't felt much like blogging at all. I think I'm in a funk of some sort right now and I'm trying to work it all out.

I'll be back soon though, and hopefully I'll be feeling much better.

Y'all take care.

Silly, Silly Me

2006-10-19T02:42:00.000-04:00

I'm sometimes a silly guy. In saying that, I'll also say I love Halloween, and I love trying on different costumes and stuff. Here is my most recent trip trying on things.

Please, if you have to throw up, please do so into the trash can to the left of you....lol!

This is me in Walgreens trying on a surfer dude hat complete with hair. I think it makes me look more ma'am than man, so after redneckgirl gets a pic and a really good laugh, I take this off, only to try on....

...THIS!!! Oh yeah, that's me in there. Looks as though I tried the wrong section to try on masks, as this one makes me look like Fatman instead of Batman.

I know it's too small for me, but it was nice and tight, and I had no trouble seeing out of it, although my face seems to be having trouble not spilling out of it.

Ah yes! This is me as a princess! This light up tiara really brings out the color in my eyes I think.

What? You don't think so? Well, maybe you're right. Actually, this tiara belongs to redneckgirls youngest sister, and I happened to hijack it during one of their birthday dinners I was at....lol.

I would say Long Live Queen Mindtwister, but there seems to be something very wrong in the way it sounds....lol!

I hope you all enjoyed this tiny look into my silly little world. If not, I guess it's a good thing I provided trash cans huh?

My Past Redux

2006-10-19T01:40:00.000-04:00

I have spoken a lot about my past but I don't think I've ever summed up just how bad it was.

Today's post from redneckgirl made mention of that, so I wanna share some of the more lurid details with you, and also how that part of me was changed completely.

Let's start by saying I've always been curious about sex, and always had an insatiable appetite for it. I still do.

I had had my fair share of relationships in the past, and in each one, there was some degree of sex involved. However, it wasn't until my ex fiancee left me that I became bad. I mean bad...like evil.

I didn't realize it now, but at that time, she had created in me a general hatred toward women, and an utter disregard for them in general.

I wanted them to hurt like I hurt. I wanted to get even.

After she left, I became what could only be known as the biggest male whore ever. I slept with women for the sake of sleeping with women. And I used almost every trick in the book to do so.

Keep in mind that I'm not bragging...I'm actually very ashamed of the things I did and the things I said in order to do what I did, but all I can do now is to tell my story with the purpose of higher education.

Basically, there were only a few things off limits in my quest. The things that were taught to me early on, which have always stuck with me:

1. Never say I Love You in order to get sex. It'll get you in the end.

2. No kissing.

3. Don't sleep with any one woman more than once.

Following these three rules got me a lot of questions and a lot of hassle from the opposite sex.

Now, to tell of my crimes against women.

Keep in mind that I wasn't in a good place, or even anything similar to one. I regret all I am about to tell here.

I have pretended to be deathly sick; ie, terminal, in order to get sex.

I have lied about my pay, job, or social status to get sex.

Out of all the women I was with, I was never there in the morning.

I can't remember the name of any of those women I slept with, and half the time didn't even bother to get their names.

Most times I wouldn't let them leave the lights on.

Many times I left while getting dressed.

I have used almost every line on women to get what I wanted.

Basically, I was bad...really bad.

Now for the important part of the story.

Near what I had no idea would be the end of this, I met redneckgirl. I saw something in her I hadn't seen in a long time. I saw the same thing in my ex fiancee, but redneckgirl had something more....more passion, more beauty (much much much more), more of everything that I wanted.

In the process of getting to know her, I started to want her. I didn't care who she was with, I wanted her. But fate was to deal me a different hand.

Before going further, let me say that from the first day we met, she and I have had that spark...that sexual tension....and we are both very passionate. This helped play out in the long run.

But for now, I wanted sex with her.

By the time I had let her know I was interested in her, I was nearing the end of my time being the way I was. It was getting boring. I was unfulfilled.

One day, we were sitting in her living room, and we had this moment, and we kissed.

That kiss told me what I already knew. It reaffirmed my want to be with her.

I will go on to say that I think she had things planned out this day because it happened to perfectly to be accidental.

We had kissed, and kissed again. I could feel the passion and that fire in her kiss and I returned as much as I had back.

I then went on further and tried to make my move. Again and again she destroyed my efforts by moving my hand, saying no, pushing me away, or repositioning her body.

Eventually I got the hint. I wasn't getting anything from her that day.

Within days, I was missing her. I couldn't believe it. I was missing her! I had not had any respect for a woman since "it" left me, and here I was missing...no, more....I was falling for this woman.

I was beside myself. I had thought I was lost to love, and here it comes flooding back into me like the dam had burst.

I told her I loved her. She didn't believe me. She knew of my past activities, and she said she would never end up as just another notch on my belt.

I have never told her, but I respect her for turning me away that day. I don't know if things would have been different today if she had not, but I'm glad she did.

Soon, I realized that we weren't going to be together, but I still tried to be with her. By this time, I had not touched another woman in a very long time, and I had no intention of going back to that.

I no longer wanted to only sleep with her....I wanted to "be" with her. I wanted all of her, not just the body!

I told her time and time again that I love her, and she would always blush and smile. She didn't believe me though, and I was unsure of how to prove my love for her.

We became more friends than anything in the coming months, which turned into years, and then one day I was told never to come back to her house...not by her. (details of this story will stay private unless she decides to comment on them)

I left and let her do what had to be done. I thought about her every day, and during the entire time she was gone, I never slept with another woman. I never even dated another woman. I thought about her all the time, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get her out of my mind.

I was working at a video store when she came in one day a couple of years later. As soon as I saw her, I was hooked all over again. The floodgates had reopened. My breath was taken away by how beautiful she was.

She bought a movie for her sister, and I gave her my email address, just in case.

I tend to think that during our conversation at the store that she was gauging if I still had feelings for her or not.

She left and I didn't hear from her for a few days. Then I got an email. It was from her. We started a long email relationship that kept going through the period when we dated.

By this time, I was completely in love with her, and would do anything she asked me to do. I hadn't been with another woman in so long, and I was in love.

When we started dating, I had decided that if fate would let me, I would marry this woman. I still want to do that.

She had completely changed who I was as a person. She helped me find the way around my hatred, and showed me I could love again...more than I ever had loved before.

I have learned a lot from her over the years. I also learned she deserved better than what she was getting, and in that, voiced my opinion many many times.

We broke it off after almost a year of dating because of the things she had to do. I promised her that there would be no other women in my life, and I meant it. She thought I was crazy, and told me I should move on. I had come to a point that I couldn't see myself doing that. I only saw our future together.

I think to this day that she didn't believe I would wait for her, but I did.

I never tried to call, or to see her. I just....existed, and lived in the love we had. It was a very sad and difficult time n my life. I feel like in some way that it was part of my penance for doing what I did back then.

We started talking again recently, and we have grown even closer than before.

To think that when I started all this, I was full of hate, and definitely going down dangerous paths that could have had me maimed, hurt, or killed.

I can honestly say that the unconditional love of this one woman has saved the life of this one man...literally.

Because of that, because of her undying and unconditional love, I give my life, my heart, and everything I am to her.

Some people don't understand this. Some people think it's weird. I call it the kind of love most people wish they had.

I Stole This From Pavel

2006-10-18T00:11:00.000-04:00

Pavel posted a birthday calculator on his site, and I thought it was pretty cool, so I took it....lmao!!!

Here are the results of mine:

Your date of conception was on or about 20 May 1972 which was a Saturday.

You were born on a Saturday
under the astrological sign Aquarius.

Your birthday falls into the Chinese year beginning 2/3/1973 and ending 1/22/1974.
You were born in the Chinese year of the Ox.

Your Native American Zodiac sign is Otter; your plant is Fern.

As of 10/18/2006 12:09:26 AM EDT
You are 33 years old.
You are 404 months old.
You are 1,758 weeks old.
You are 12,303 days old.
You are 295,272 hours old.
You are 17,716,329 minutes old.
You are 1,062,979,766 seconds old.

Celebrities who share your birthday:

Lance Berkman (1976)
Laura Dern (1967)
Cliff Burton (1962)
George Stephanopoulos (1961)
Greg Norman (1955)
Mark Spitz (1950)
Roberta Flack (1939)
Robert Wagner (1930)
Leontyne Price (1927)
Lon Chaney, Jr. (1906)
Bertolt Brecht (1898)
Jimmy Durante (1893)
Boris Pasternak (1890)

Top songs of 1973

Killing Me Softly with His Song by Roberta Flack
Tie a Yellow Ribbon Round the Old Oak Tree by Dawn
My Love by Paul McCartney & Wings
You're So Vain by Carly Simon
Crocodile Rock by Elton John
Let's Get It On by Marvin Gaye
Keep On Truckin' by Eddie Kendricks
Bad, Bad Leroy Brown by Jim Croce
Top of the World by Carpenters
Midnight Train to Georgia by Gladys Knight & the Pips

Your age is the equivalent of a dog that is 4.81526418786693 years old. (You're still chasing cats!)

Your birthstone is Amethyst

The Mystical properties of Amethyst

Amethyst is used to increase spiritually

Some lists consider these stones to be your birthstone. (Birthstone lists come from Jewelers, Tibet, Ayurvedic Indian medicine, and other sources)

Bloodstone, Onyx, Moonstone

Your birth tree is

Cedar, the Confidence

Of rare beauty, knows how to adapt, likes luxury, of good health not in the least shy, tends to look down on others, self-confident, determined, impatient, wants to impress others, many talents, industrious, healthy, optimism, waiting for the one true love, able to make quick decisions.

The moon's phase on the day you were
born was in its first quarter.

This is very interesting info. My favorite part is one celecrity that shares a birthday with me...Cliff Burton!!!!!!!!

Cliff Em All Baby!!!!

Sorry...I happen to think that Cliff Burton is an awesome musician, and was taken from us well before his time.

The Weekend - Sunday

2006-10-17T01:52:00.000-04:00

We got up early on Sunday because we had to go to church.

Before I go any further, let me say that I can count on my fingers the number of times I had been ion a church for an actual service that wasn't a wedding or some other function other than worship. When I was younger, I had issues with God, and decided to try other options. I have since seen that those were the wrong ways.

However, I was always nervous in churches....like I would be struck down just for going into one.

We go to church and afterwards, redneckgirl, her mother, her grandmother, and myself go to O'Charley's.

After we ate, we took her grandmother home, and then her mother.

Then we went to watch mustangscarlett play softball, and stayed a chatted with her for awhile after it was over.

Then after that, we went to visit my sisters grave.

This is particularly hard for me to do, because I feel bad for not having done it before.

My sister was taken from this world 27 years ago. I have only visited her, until Sunday, 2 or 3 times. Suddenly I felt guilty. I felt like I had not given enough of my time or love to her memory, and it tore me apart inside.

We went and I found her grave automatically. I cleaned off the stone and as soon as I did, I started crying uncontrollably. I didn't know what was coming over me, but I couldn't stop crying.

Redneckgirl put her arm around me and consoled me as best she could without crying.

I told my sister I was sorry for neglecting her memory for so long, and that I promised I would be with her more often. I told her I loved her and told her sorry over and over again.

We left after about a half an hour, me still crying and driving, and redneckgirl telling me her thoughts on why I was feeling the way I did, and what we could do about it.

Then we went back to her house, picked up her mother and her sister and went shopping at Meijers.

I picked up a couple of bouquets of plastic flowers and a little teddy bear with a little Halloween sweater on it to put on my sisters stone. After the shopping, I took the three of them home. Then I went to visit my mother, whom I had been having issues with over some of her habits, so to speak.

I let her know I visited my sister, and told her how much I care for her, and that I didn't want to end up burying her, and that she needed to stop these particular bad habits she had been doing.

We talked for awhile, and she ended up sending me home with food, like she always does, and she let me have some silverware, as I lost mine in one of my moves.

I went home, and then talked to redneckgirl for awhile. She invited me back over, and I went and hung out there while the kids were sleeping.

She further consoled me and held me, and I ended up falling asleep on her.

I went home later on and went to bed.

After she got off of work on Monday, her and I went back to my sisters grave and placed the flowers in the vase and attached the bear to that vase with a rubber band.

I broke down again, but not as bad this time.

I have always had a hard time showing emotion to people because I was raised up to believe that real men don't cry. They don't show those emotions. I was raised up that you were weak if you cried.

I realize now that real men do cry...they do show their emotions and aren't afraid not to because of what people think.

I want to thank you all for reading this. I had tears in my eyes writing this as well. If you think I'm weak.....well....that's what you think I suppose. I'll not try to change your mind.

I hope you all have a great day.

The Weekend - Saturday or "Drunk+Drunk=Fucked Up"

2006-10-17T00:33:00.000-04:00

On Saturday, we got together early. We got cappucinos and Dairy Queens for breakfast. We went back home to eat it, and then we started our day shopping.

We were actually going out looking for a particular perfume she likes, but couldn't find it because the manufacturers have reformulated it and it just isn't the same.

On a side note, I have to say that it smells fantastic on her, but then again, I think almost everything does. However, the one she likes really goes good with her chemical makeup and just releases something in her.

So we went to Value City to check out clothes and look for that perfume. They didn't have it. We were about to leave, and I decided to look at the men's section, where she picked out a pair of jeans and some nice underclothes for me. I say underclothes because I'm not too sure what they call them, and I don't wanna try to guess :P

After that, we went to a few more stores, and then we hit the Fashion Bug.

She picked out a couple of things to try on, and found an outfit of sorts that made her even more beautiful than she already was. She went to try them on, and asked me to hold a bra she was considering buying.

So, here I am in the middle of this store, holding on to a bright yellow bra, just looking like a confused man....lol!

I decided to check out the jewelry, and saw 2 pairs of earrings I thought she might like. When she came out of the dressing room, I asked her which ones she liked the best, and I bought those for her. She decided to put the bra back, or should I say that I should put the bra back. I did so and we left the store.

We then went to try and get my tire fixed on my truck. We dropped it off and went to have Subway while it was being worked on.

We went back to get the truck, and they told me the tire couldn't be repaired, and they had no replacements in the store. I told them when I got the cash that I would buy a new one. I could have gotten it then, but this was redneckgirls birthday weekend, and I needed everything for her. Besides, it is a slow leak, and I usually have to air it back up once or twice a day at most.

We were supposed to go bowling, but we ran out of time. When we were about to pass the bowling lanes, I started talking trash to her, and it eventually got to her so bad she told me to pull in, that even though we didn't have time to bowl, that she wanted to shut me up....lol.

I pull in and we go pay for our game. To make a long story short, she handed me my ass in that game, so I couldn't talk any more trash about it....this time....lmao!

Then we went back to the house and she asked me to cut her hair. I was very apprehensive at first because I had never cut anyone's hair before, and I didn't wanna mess hers up.

She said she trusted me, then told me I was the "only" man to ever cut her hair.

I took about 3 inches off of the back, and I was pleased whenb I was done. Then it was time to dye the hair, so I helped her with that.

We then proceeded to get ready for the nighttime activities that were planned.

Around 7, we went to pick up hard2stop. She was definitely ready to get her party on. We then went to a restaurant called Rafferty's for dinner. We met 3 other friends there, and proceeded to have dinner.

Well, this is where things started becoming kind of weird. Apparently one of the friends has been being very, very self centered lately, and only thinks of herself.

I'll say from the start that her and I are at odds because she doesn't want redneckgirl to be with me. She lies about that in front of me, but you know actions speak louder.

She was being the hag from hell this night, and she would end up being the source of much stress for the friends who were with us, and a great source of enjoyment for me, because I took much pleasure in her pain this evening.

I can tell you right now, I had a strong feeling she didn't want me to go. She kept shooting me dirty looks along with a few of the others there too. You know, I'm tired of calling her she, so from now on, I'll refer to her as Mrs. Ed.

Now Mrs. Ed had asked me why I was wearing my ring on my ring finger instead of my thumb. I joked and told her that it was to keep other ladies away from me, to which she had the audacity to reply that she wasn't aware I had to fight them off.

I did my best to overlook her rude comment and go on with my dinner.

After dinner wew were going to go to a salsa bar, but it turns out it wasn't really a salsa bar, but a worldly restaurant with world music....not what we had in mind.

We ended up going to the redneck bar, and singing karaoke and letting the ladies drink.

Well, Mrs. Ed had decided to invite a guy we'll call Smith with her. The problem with this is that Smith claims to be in love with her. I have reasons to believe otherwise, but I won't say them here.

Now, Mrs. Ed invited Smith. The problem with this is that Mrs. Ed has no, and I mean no interest in Smith. Smith is in love with her. See where this is going?

All night long...no, let me repeat this for the sake of effects...."all night long", Smith was on Mrs. Ed like nothing I'd ever seen. Where she would go, he would be. They ended up fighting one another all night, which I took great pleasure in watching.

Smith ended up looking like the most pathetic being to ever walk the earth, and Mrs. Ed was more hot and cold towards him than a broken faucet.

Plainly, she was being the biggest bitch toward him that I've ever seen, and that's really saying something.

Of course, based on previously untold things, he deserved it too.

They made each other miserable all night long.

She ended up being so drunk that she could barely walk. Redneckgirl and I had to literally fight her to get her drink away from her when it was time to leave, and then get her into my truck.

We got her home and dropped off mustangscarlett and hard2stop, then went home orselves.

Needless to say, it was a really different kind of evening with her and him around. And not in a good way.

Credit for the mathematical equation goes to redneckgirl :)

The Weekend - Friday

2006-10-16T23:21:00.000-04:00

The weekend posts will be split into 3 parts. Mainly because the atmosphere and attitude is different for all 3 days, and I don't want them getting all mixed up. Hopefully you'll read and enjoy, get mad, and feel empathetic all at the same time :)

As you all know, Friday was redneckgirls birthday. I had some fun little plans for her most of the day, and here's how it all went.

First, I wake up kind of early, and go to cash my check and get the first part of her gifts.

I get her 2 dozen pink roses, one dozen hot pink, and another dozen light pink. I get a vase to put them in and then arrange them so they look pretty in the vase. I also get her a card, and a jewelry box for all the jewelry she already has, and what I plan on getting her.

I get to her house, and we have some running to do, so we go together to do the running, but not before I presented her with the roses and the card. The jewelry box has to wait as I didn't have a chance to wrap it yet.

Her eyes lit up in a way that is indescribable. Kind of like the kid at Christmas, but so loving too. I have to say, I could live in that look forever :)

We do our running and have lunch at the Hometown Buffet. We both love a good buffet and theirs is good...lol.

Then we went to Meijers ( a local grocery/retail/general merchandise store for those who are unfamiliar with them), and did a little shopping there.

After we were done, it was time to pick up her children, so I went home and started getting ready for the romantic part of the evening.

She went to pick up her children and have cake that her sister and her oldest son made together, which, I have to say, was very sweet :)

So I shower and wrap her gift and get other things ready for the evening.

Then a little bit of a wrench was thrown into the plans.

I had made reservations at a nice restaurant for 8pm that evening, and by 7:30, I hadn't heard anything from her. At 7:45, I decided that we wouldn't make the reservations, so I came up with plan B.

I rushed to Krogers and bought food for the evening and started cooking it as soon as I got home.

She called about as soon as I walked through the door, and I had to find some way to stall her. I lied that I wanted her to go get us a bottle of wine, even though I had already picked one up earlier.

Naturally, she called me on it, and I said I had drank it all. She really didn't wanna go to the store without me, and before she even went, I told her I was sending her because I was in the middle of preparing her surprise.

During this whole time, I was rushing to get the meal cooked and ready for her.

She got back with the wine much sooner than I had expected, and said she needed to get ready. She apologized for taking so long, but her youngest didn't want her to leave...lol.

I had her cover her eyes while she went through the house so she wouldn't see anything, and she proceeded to the bathroom to get ready.

I finished cooking, then brought out the wine and some candles. I ended up making spaghetti, with a little side salad, a nice wine to drink with it, and cheesecake for dessert.

I had it all set out by candlelight with a CD of our songs playing for ambience.

We ate, then I had her wait in the living room as I prepared the cheesecake with one canle on a topper that had Happy Birthday playing on it. She then made a wish and blew out her candle.

Then we went back into the living room, and I let her open her jewelry box. She commented on my wrapping job, and the fact I used 2 bows on it instead of 1. She taught me well about that, what can I say....lol!

When she unwrapped the jewelry box, she was immediately in love with it, telling how beautiful it was and how it complimented the wood on her dresser.

Then we got into my truck and went downtown. Once there, we found a place to park, and we had a 30 minute carriage ride around the downtown area, follwed by a romantic walk on the waterfront.

We then went back home and called it an evening.

I think her eyes and the looks she gave me tell the whole story. I'm positive she had a wonderful birthday, and I'm glad I could contribute as much as I did :)

My Father

2006-10-13T01:01:00.000-04:00

I stated that I was having mixed feelings about this, but you really don't know what "this" is yet, so I'll fill you in.

Starting at the beginning, my mom got pregnant with me, her first time having sex, with some douchebag who was even lucky to get to breathe the same air as her. Some time later, I was born, and things appeared like they may be good.

One disclaimer....I don't actually remember the first events, so I'm going on what I've been told by both my mother and him.

Apparently they were happy for a time with me...not very long, and he decided to go out screwing around on my mother. Typical guy shit.

My mom left him, and I wasn't even 2 years old yet. Then she hooked up with someone else, and some time later, my first of 3 sisters were born.

We were living in South Dakota at the time, and my mom decided she would move us to Kentucky...best decision she ever made.

We moved when I was 4, and never looked back at South Dakota again.

I, however, was curious about my father.

Over time, I realized he wasn't coming. He wasn't going to be there. Ever.

I hated that feeling, and I still despise it to this day.

Was I sooo bad, such a burden to this man that he felt he didn't need to be near me? Was I so terrible that he didn't want me?

Over time, my wondering had grew into resentment, which grew into hatred, which grew into more hatred.

I could feel that he didn't want me...he didn't want to be a part of my life.

He never wrote, never called. I got nothing on Christmas, or Easter, or my birthday. My mom made up for this as best she could, but every year I heard nothing from him made me hate him even more.

So when I was 12 or 13, I devised a plan...a plan I'm still wondering if I'll ever carry out or not.

The plan, as it were, consists of me taking a trip to South Dakota, going to his house and beating the ever loving shit out of him, making sure to break 1 bone for each year of my life he missed.

I wanted it. I wanted it so badly I could taste it. I could taste it like you can taste the blood in your mouth after someone punches you in the mouth. And I liked that.

The plan changed accordingly to different things over the course of my life. It went from breaking bones to maiming, to torturing, then to killing completely. But I never did it....any of it.

I spoke with him on my 18th birthday. My curiosity got the best of me and I decided to look him up and call.

He knew who I was, and sounded happy to hear from me. He said he was sorry that he didn't try to call, or write, or be involved with me in any way. He said that even before we left town, he was moving on.

How could he do this to me? Why was I not good enough?

And what the fuck was sorry supposed to do to answer my questions or make me feel better?

That very brief conversation refueled the rage in me tenfold, and I wanted blood.

I almost left town that day, but something inside stopped me. Something told me if I went, I would most definitely regret it. So I didn't go. Instead, I put it on the back burner again, and just resumed life.

I got to speak with him again about 4 years ago. Once again, very short conversation, but I wanted answers. I think I'm entitled to some answers from this guy. As per usual, I was left with none.

By then I had met redneckgirl, and she convinced me that he wasn't worth the effort, that it didn't matter because I have people down here with me who love me.

That seemed to help ease things a bit. Actually, that seemed to ease things a lot in my mind. I decided to not ever call him again, seeing as how he has never, ever called me.

I also abandoned the plan. Life seemed to be getting better having that burden away from these shoulders.

I was perfectly fine for 4 years. Then tonight happened.

I don't know what triggered it, but suddenly, all my rage for him, all my emotions came rushing back, and I wanted blood again.

I have talked myself out of it for now. I have calmed myself to a point to where I feel like I can and should blog about it, and get it out there.

I do feel a little better, but still bitter right now. I have tears welling up in my eyes as I write certain parts of this, because even though it happened a lifetime ago, it doesn't hurt any less now, knowing that he had a chance...he could have known me and how good a person I've become, and seen how good I am with computers and other things, but he passed that chance up. "He" decided I wasn't worth it.

Fuck him! Fuck him up his ass!

He can burn in hell for all I care, and if I'm ever there with him, I'm stoking the fire even hotter, even if I get burned more in the process.

As of this writing, I only have 2 memories of my father, both of them phone conversations. I have no recollection of ever having seen him, although I know I have. I was way too young to remember though.

I have no idea what he looks like or anything, and I can't even remember how he sounds.

I hate to ramble on like this, but tonight has been a bad father kind of night. One that makes a kid plan out devious schemes to get even...for justice to be served. For him to get his just rewards.

I don't know how to end this post. I feel a little better about it all, but I'm still furious at both him and myself. Him for the obvious, and myself for allowing these thoughts to once again enter my mind and permeate my being.

I guess I'll end it by telling you all to have a great weekend, and that I'll post again soon.

How does that sound?

Another Reason

2006-10-13T00:56:00.000-04:00

Yet another reason I haven't been blogginh is Star Wars.

Not the movies, but the books. I am currently on book 5 of a 27 book series in the ol extended universe, and the story arc is starting to get really good.

And you know how that goes....it grabs your attention and just won't let you go!

That, and I'm having some really mixed emotions about certain aspects of my life right now. Not about present things, but things of the past relating to my family....or to be more direct...my father....again.

But, that's fodder for a completely different post. Perhaps soon I'll delve into that and share how I feel about it with you all......if you're good....lol!

I'll be back later to put up my Big Hair Friday video when I can get near a PC I'm allowed to watch streaming media on.

Happy Birthday Redneckgirl!!!!!!!

2006-10-13T00:00:00.000-04:00

I wanna wish redneckgirl a very Happy Birthday!!!!!

Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday dear Redneckgiiiiiirrrrlllll,
Happy Birthday tooooooooo youuuuuuuuuu!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope you have a good one and get everything you want :)

So what are you all waiting for? Go to her blog and wish her a Happy Birthday :)

My Music Meme

2006-10-07T01:32:00.000-04:00

So I've been tagged by redneckgirl for the 7 songs I listen to right now.

Here's the directions:

List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words or even if they’re not any good, but they must be songs you’re really enjoying now. Post these instructions in your Live Journal/blog along with your seven songs. Then tag seven other people to see what they’re listening to.

Ok, here we go:

1. White and Nerdy - Weird Al

They see me mowin'... my front lawn
I know they're all thinkin' I'm so white & nerdy
Think I'm just too white & nerdy
Think I'm just too white & nerdy
Can't ya see I'm white & nerdy?
Look at me, I'm white & nerdy
I wanna roll with... the gangstas
But so far they all think I'm too white and nerdyThink I'm just too white & nerdy
Think I'm just too white & nerdy
I'm just too white & nerdy
Really, really white & nerdy

First in my class there at MIT
Got skills, I'm a champion at D&D
MC Escher, that's my favorite MC
Keep your 40, I'll just have an Earl Grey tea
My rims never spin - to the contrary
You'll find that they're quite stationary
All of my action figures are cherry
Stephen Hawking's in my library
My MySpace page is all totally pimped out
Got people beggin' for my Top 8 spaces
Yo, I know pi to a thousand places
Ain't got no grills, but I still wear braces
I order all of my sandwiches with mayonnaise
I'm a whiz at Minesweeper, I could play for days
Once you see my sweet moves, you're gonna stay amazed
My fingers movin' so fast, I'll set the place ablaze
There's no killer app I haven't run
At Pascal, well, I'm number one
Do vector calculus just for fun
I ain't got a gat but I got a soldering gun
"Happy Days" is my favorite theme song
I could sure kick your butt in a game of ping pong
I'll ace any trivia quiz you bring on
I'm fluent in JavaScript as well as Klingon
Here's the part I sing on...

They see me roll on... my Segway
I know in my heart they think I'm white & nerdy
Think I'm just too white & nerdy
Think I'm just too white & nerdy
Can't ya see I'm white & nerdy?
Look at me, I'm white & nerdy
I'd like to roll with... the gangstas
Although it's apparent I'm too white and nerdy
Think I'm just too white & nerdy
Think I'm just too white & nerdy
I'm just too white & nerdy
How'd I get so white & nerdy?

I've been browsin', inspectin'
X-Men comics, you know I collect 'em
The pens in my pocket, I must protect 'em
My ergonomic keyboard never leaves me bored
Shoppin' online for deals on inscribable media
I edit, Wikipedia
I memorized "Holy Grail" really well
I can recite it right now and have you ROTFLOL
I got a business doin' web sites
When my friends need some code, who do they call?
I do HTML for 'em all
Even made a home page for my dog
Yo, I got myself a fanny pack
They were havin' a sale down at The Gap
Spend my nights with a roll of bubble wrap
Pop pop, hope no one sees me... gettin' freaky
I'm nerdy in the extreme and whiter than sour cream
I was in A/V Club and Glee Club and even the chess team
Only question I ever thought was hard
Was, do I like Kirk or do I like Picard?
Spend every weekend at the Renaissance Fair
Got my name on my underwear

They see me strollin'... they laughin'
And rollin' their eyes 'cause I'm so white & nerdy
Just because I'm white & nerdy
Just because I'm white & nerdy
All because I'm white & nerdy
Holy cow, I'm white & nerdy
I wanna bowl with... the gangstas
But oh well, it's obvious I'm white and nerdy
Think I'm just too white & nerdy
Think I'm just too white & nerdy
I'm just too white & nerdy
Look a' me, I'm white & nerdy

(This is just a fun song, and it's fun to sing when you're actually mowing the lawn)

2. Rockstar - Nickelback

I'm through with standin' in lines
to clubs I'll never get in
It's like the bottom of the ninth
and I'm never gonna win
this life hasn't turned out
quite the way I want it to be
(Tell me what you want)

I want a brand new house
on an episode of Cribs
And a bathroom I can play baseball in
And a king size tub big enough
for ten plus me
--(For what you need)--

I need a a credit card that's got no limit
And a big black jet with a bedroom in it
Gonna join the mile high club
At thirty-seven thousand feet
--(Been there done that)--

I want a new tour bus full of old guitars
My own star on Hollywood Boulevard
Somewhere between Cher and
James Dean is fine for me
(So how you gonna do it?)

I'm gonna trade this life for fortune and fame
I'd even cut my hair and change my name

[CHORUS]
'Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars and
Live in hilltop houses driving fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We'll all stay skinny 'cause we just won't eat
And we'll hang out in the coolest bars
in the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger's
Gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny
With her bleach blonde hair
And well...

Hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar
Hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar

I wanna be great like Elvis without the tassels
Hire eight body guards that love to beat up assholes
Sign a couple autographs
So I can eat my meals for free
--(I'll have the quesadilla, ha-ha)--

I'm gonna dress my ass
with the latest fashion
Get a front door key to the Playboy mansion
Gonna date a centerfold that loves to
blow my money for me
(So how you gonna do it?)

I'm gonna trade this life
For fortune and fame
I'd even cut my hair
And change my name

'Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses driving fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
we'll all stay skinny 'cause we just won't eat
And we'll hang out in the coolest bars
in the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger's
Gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny
With her bleach blonde hair
And we'll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary of
today's who's who
They'll get you anything
with that evil smile
Everybody's got a
drug dealer on speed dial, well
Hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar

I'm gonna sing those songs
that offend the censors
Gonna pop my pills
from a Pez dispenser
Get washed-up singers writing all my songs
Lip --sync-- 'em every night so I don't get 'em wrong

Well we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in Hilltop houses driving fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We'll all stay skinny 'cause we just won't eat
And we'll hang out in the coolest bars
in the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger's
Gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny
With her bleach blond hair
And we'll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary of
today's who's who
They'll get you anything
with that evil smile
Everybody's got a
drug dealer on speed dial, well

Hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar
Hey, hey, I wanna be a rockstar

(Yet another fun song. Gotta love it!!!)

3. Sexyback - Justin Timberlake

Redneckgirl already has provided the song and some lyrics, so I'll leave it at that :)

(This song really is a train wreck, but it has grown on me, and sometimes I get it in my head and have to sing it to get it out)

4. I Write Sins Not Tragedies - Panic! At The Disco

Oh, well imagine; as I'm pacing the pews in a church corridor,
and I can't help but to hear, no I can't help but to hear an exchanging of words.
"What a beautiful wedding!", "What a beautiful wedding!"
says a bridesmaid to a waiter. "And yes, but what a shame, what a shame,
the poor groom's bride is a whore." I'd chime in with a
"Haven't you people ever heard of closing the god damn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things
with a sense of poise and rationality. I'd chime in
"Haven't you people ever heard of closing the god damn door?!"
No, it's much better to face these kinds of things with a sense of...oh.

(This song just calls to me to sing sing sing it...and I do!)

5. Freak-a-Zoid - Midnight Star

freakazoids...robots..please report
freakazoids...robots...please report to the dance floor

z-o-i-d-s
z-o-i-d-s, freakazoids
z-o-i-d-s
z-o-i-d-s rock baby

dance

i'll be your freakazoid, c'mon and wind me up (2x)

kick up your heels, baby relax your mind, leave all your worries to me
cuz i am the one, to take care of you, and all of your physical needs
you see...

(chorus)
ill be your freakazoid, c'mon and wind me up, no tears babe
ill be your freakzoid, c'mon and wind me up

shake your body like you just dont care
i said im ready to be a freakazoid, if you care
i said, shake your body like you just dont care
i said to, be a freakazoid if you dare
i said..

z-o-i-d-s
z-o-i-d-s, rock baby

so baby come here, let me satisfy you, i know just what you need
i never get tired, im rechargable, my senses are ready to please
you see..

(chorus 2x)

i am now, in automission
your every wish, is my command
technique to the dance floor

we are, midnight star, we gonna show you how to do it, yes we are
we got frakazoid robots, at our guards, wont stop, wont stop, rockin
the floor...

girl: oh..hello, and what are you doing?
guy: the freakazoid
girl: the freakazoid? how do you spell it?
guy: z-o-i-d-s
girl: z-o-i-d-s? zoids?
guy: freakazoids
girl: oh! to you... i think ive got it....rock baby

z-o-i-d-s
z-o-i-d-s, rock baby

(chorus 2x)

shake your body like you just dont care
i said im ready to be a freakazoid if you care
i said, shake your body like you just dont care
i said, be a freakazoid if you dare

6. Far Away - Nickelback

This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of Hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything, but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

So far away
So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say

I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go

(This song reminds me so much of redneckgirl that I have listened to it multiple times a day, and sing it to her too!)

7. s(AINT) - Marilyn Manson

I don't care if your world is ending today
Because I wasn't invited to it anyway
You said I tasted famous, so I drew you a heart
But now I'm not an artist I'm a fucking work of art
I've got an F and a C and I got a K too
And the only thing that's missing is a bitch like you

You wanted perfect
You got your perfect
But now I'm too perfect for someone like you
I was a dandy in your ghetto with
A snow white smile and you'll
Never be as perfect whatever you do

What's my name, what's my name?
Hold the S because I am an AINT
What's my name, what's my name?
Hold the S because I am an AINT

I am a bonetop, a death's head
On a mopstick
You infected me, took diamonds
I took all your shit
Your "sell-by-date" expired,
So you had to be sold
I'm a suffer-genius and
Vivi-sex symbol

You wanted perfect
You got your perfect
But now I'm too perfect for someone like you
I was a dandy in your ghetto with
A snow white smile and you'll
Never be as perfect whatever you do

What's my name, what's my name?
Hold the S because I am an AINT
What's my name, what's my name?
Hold the S because I am an AINT

I've got an "F" and a "C" and I got a "K" too
And the only thing that's missing is "U"
I've got an F and a C and I got a K too
And the only thing that's missing is a bitch like you
I've got an F and a C and I got a K too
And the only thing that's missing is a bitch like you
I am a dandy in the ghetto with a snow white smile
Super-ego bitch, I've been evil awhile
I am a dandy in the ghetto with a snow white smile
Super-ego bitch, I've been evil awhile
What's my name, what's my name?
Hold the S because I am an AINT
What's my name, what's my name?
Hold the S because I am an AINT
What's my name, what's my name?
Hold the S because I am an AINT
What's my name, what's my name?
Hold the S because I am an AINT

(This song just makes me feel powerful, and I've always been a huge Manson fan!!)

Hope you liked this meme.

I'll go ahead and tag everyone who reads me because I don't know if I have 7 readers or not.....lol!

A Horse Is A Horse Of Course.....NOT!!!

2006-10-06T19:18:00.000-04:00

I feel so ripped off now. I may be showing my age a bit, but I really did think Mr. Ed was a horse....now I find out differently, as listed below:

Although the Mister Ed television show enjoyed a five-year run on CBS in the early 1960s, it was actually one of the very first series to start out in syndication and then be picked up by a network. (Mister Ed premiered as a syndicated show in January 1961, and CBS added it to their prime time schedule the following October.) Without network backing in the beginning, however, the show's budget was extremely tight. During the filming of the pilot episode, production costs mounted as the Pssst. Listen . . . recalcitrant horse cast as Mister Ed refused to perform on cue (if it performed at all), resulting in large expenditures to cover the costs of additional training fees and wasted footage.

The producers of the show were ready to throw in the towel and write off the venture when one of the putative Mister Ed's trainers came up with a solution: the nearby Jungleland animal park in Thousand Oaks, California, had a trained Grevy's zebra that was being used in live shows for the park's daily tour visitors. The zebra (a female, called "Amelia" by its Jungleland handlers) was trained to perform many of the same actions (e.g., opening and closing its mouth, stamping its feet on cue) required in the Mr. Ed role, and Jungleland consented to lend her out for a few days' filming.

Amelia worked out fantastically well, exceeding everyone's expectations, and the pilot was quickly wrapped up and sold to the syndication market. The producers made a generous donation to Jungleland in exchange for continued use of Amelia, and she appeared in all the syndicated episodes as well as all the shows comprising the series' entire five-year run on CBS. Amelia retired to Jungleland when Mr. Ed was cancelled after the 1965-66 season, where she lived for three years before being sold at auction when Jungleland closed in 1969.

The show's premise, of course, called for a talking horse, not a zebra. The producers felt the concept was already absurd enough without stretching credulity by having to explain why someone would have left a zebra (let alone a talking one) at a country house, so they chose not to explain it at all. They stuck with the original premise instead: Mister Ed was always referred to as a "horse," and since the series was filmed in black and white, the viewing audience couldn't tell the difference.

(The difficulty in resolving closely integrated black and white images on non-color television receivers was one of the primary reasons NFL games were not regularly televised until the mid-1960s, when sales of color TV sets started to outstrip those of black-and-white models. When black-and-white television predominated in the nation's living rooms, football games were too often disrupted when players ran into the referees, whose black-and-white striped uniform tops made them nearly invisible to onlookers. Likewise, Johnny Cash's famous televised live concert performance at California's Folsom Prison in January 1968 proved disastrous when several inmates wearing the traditional black and white prisoner's garb slipped unnoticed past guards, who had been provided only black and white monitors with which to view the proceedings.)

Zebras are noticeably smaller than horses, so the set used for Mister Ed's stable was constructed using forced perspective (the same technique employed on Disneyland's Main Street) to make it appear larger than it really was (and thus make Mister Ed appear larger than he really was as well). This gimmick also helped to mask the fact that Alan Young, the series' star, was only a diminutive 5'4" tall. Since a zebra's gait is distinctively different than a horse's, the rare episodes that called for scenes of Mister Ed running were filmed in long shots using real horses, a practice which has lead to the mistaken claim (cited in several fan-related publications and web sites) that a zebra was occasionally used on the show as a "stunt double." (In later years a Palamino horse named Bamboo Harvester would often be erroneously identified as having been the Mister Ed, but this horse was in fact only used for promotional appearances and publicity stills; it never actually appeared in the TV series.)

The substitution was an open secret around the industry, however, and continual sly references to zebras were worked into the show. The two most blatant examples were the episode of 21 March 1963, "Ed the Zebra," and the episode of 17 October 1965, "Anybody Got a Zebra?" The former episode was a joke-within-a-joke wherein a disgruntled Ed ran away to the zoo, leaned up against a newly-painted black fence, and started a new life as a zebra. (Ironically, the photography crew actually had to shoot Ed's "zebra" scenes for that episode in color and then convert them back to black-and-white in order to make Mister Ed appear as a zebra to the audience!)

When CBS switched to a primarily color prime time line-up for the 1965-66 season, both they and the series' producers were faced with a dilemma: keeping the show as a black and white entry would have presented a jarring contrast with the network's other shows, but switching to color would have given away the ruse. Eventually, a CBS executive came up with a clever solution: the show was moved out of prime time into the 5:30-6:00 PM slot on Sunday evenings for the series' final year, thus avoiding the necessity of its conversion to color.

Big Hair Friday!!! BONUS!

2006-10-06T14:03:00.000-04:00

I couldn't decide on just one today, so I gave redneckgirl a choice on the one I wanted as the first one, and I wanted to put this one up as well.

THIS song is the song that turned me on to metal! Before this, I'm sad to say it was all Paula Abdul, Tiffany, and Debbie Gibson and their prepackaged songs. Don't get me wrong...I still like them, but metal "woke me up".

Once again, I hope you enjoy, and have a great weekend!!!

Big Hair Friday!!!

2006-10-06T14:00:00.000-04:00

I haven't much felt like blogging for the last couple of days....writers blog or something, so in order to make up for lack of content, I present Guns N Roses with "November Rain", and also another video today as well!

Enjoy your weekend folks!

My Weekend Roundup

2006-10-03T01:12:00.000-04:00

Well, I know redneckgirl and I had pretty much the same weekend, but I wanted to elaborate on more of it.

Friday Night for me was boring...work and more work.

Saturday I got to take redneckgirl out, and as she said, we went to the balloon festival. It really was great. We had to run through the drainage ditch, and it was dark, so we didn't see how muddy it was. We both slipped a bit, and I tried catching her all the times she almost fell. She seemed to get the worst of the ditch by stepping in the muddiest of the places...lol!

We finally got into the area they were having the balloon glow at, and we snapped a few pics with our camera phones, then we decided to get something to eat.

We went and got our food and made our way to the beer garden, where we each got a light draft. We enjoyed our beer and funnel cake together, and then went outside to watch the fireworks. We were hand in hand, watching the sky light up and enjoying the company of one another.

We then went back to my place, where I proceeded to give her a massage by candlelight, and also played a card game, and had some cheese and wine.

On Sunday, I got her early, and we went to Bernheim Forest. I took her on this romantic walk around the lake and we stopped and looked at the flora and odd things we would see on the way. Then we visited the statue that she has posted on her blog, and took pics on the bench you see there as well.

As she said, it was very, very peaceful. I had a wonderful time, as I always do, and am hoping to do it all again soon.

Chewbacca!!! What A Wookie!

2006-10-03T00:46:00.000-04:00

This is a bit strange. This is my warning to you.

Actually, this is a couple of links that are for Chewbacca. I happened upon 2 of his myspace accounts, and his blog. It was a very interesting read, but it was in wookie....lol.

So I now present the links to you below:

Chewbacca's MySpace Profile

Chewbacca sings Christmas songs

Chewbacca's other MySpace account

Chewbacca's Blog

Hope you all enjoy this as much as I did :)

After The Wedding

2006-10-03T00:37:00.000-04:00

Ok, as said below, after the wedding, we visited Tumbleweed and had food and libation.

Then we went to the bar, as stated before, that was a redneck bar. Redneck bar for a redneck wedding...lol

We went into the bar and was greeted by the usual DJ. Then we picked up our playslips and chose our songs while the ladies began their journey becoming "chip faced."

I don't really think they drank "that" much, but it sure was enough. Redneckgirl and I danced many dances and we would all karaoke. After awhile though, hard2stop started bobbing her head to a different tune, and I think she accomplished becoming chip faced, like she wanted to be :)

One thing you gotta know about hard2stop is that when I'm not the DD, she is, so she doesn't get to drink all the time when we or they all go out.

After some time, the bobbing got more severe, and I knew it was time to go. She had a concert playing in her head, but she was feeling really, and I mean really good!

We went to take her home and made sure she got in her house, then we left, and redneckgirl fell asleep in the truck on her way home. I had to drive slower because she was lying at a strange angle, which seemed to be comfortable to her, but I was scared she was going to open the door.

After I dropped her off, I went home and passed out myself, only because I was tired.

Overall, I had a good time, and I would definitely do it again with them both. I'm sure if you watch this space, there will be more stories of the adventures of the three of us again :)

Redneck Wedding Part The Second

2006-10-03T00:22:00.000-04:00

Ok...if you haven't read the first part, stop here and go read Hard2stop'sviews on this wedding, then come back here and we'll finish up this old honkey tonk shindig!

Ok, now that you've done that, I'll continue.

I'm not going to say anything about the wedding, as I think quite enough has been said on the subject by hard2stop....lol.

My big problem is with the reception and the DJ, especially the DJ!

After the wedding, we go into the reception hall, which is actually a gymnasium. I immediately felt like this was a homecoming dance or something.

We, meaning redneckgirl, hard2stop, and myself find ourselves a seat, and we wait. The DJ started playing songs, and almost every one was a sad country song about a loss, or losing the one you love. Not very appropriate for a wedding if you ask me, but, you didn't.

Then, this DJ starts playing parts of songs, and it turns out, she was doing the sound check at that very moment. Now pardon me for saying, but I don't find it professional that the DJ was doing a sound test and equalizing her speakers during the actual reception. I find it very unprofessional.

Also, the equipment was kind of shoddy, and for every problem, the DJ and her assistant said to spit on the equipment and it would fix it.....I "told" you this was redneck!!!

So then, the happy couple comes in, and the buffet line, if that's what you really wanna call it, starts with no signals, no announcements....nothing!

After the eating was done, the bride and groom had their first dance. Then the DJ started playing some typical wedding type things. After some time, they had the dance with the parents. Then it was back to other stuff again. If planning and coordination were brains, the DJ would have been left out in the cold. She had none!

Then the karaoke started. Each of us sang a song, and we were probably the best there.

We talked about our escape long before it happened, but I was finally happy to break free. As a celebration of our new found freedom, we went to tumbleweed to celebrate with some eats and big margaritas for the ladies (I had coke).

Then, we went to the bar....which is a whole other story, which will be listed above :)

Big Hair Friday!!!

2006-09-30T01:10:00.000-04:00

Here is a little Ratt for you with "Round and Round". Enjoy!

You're Fired!!!!

2006-09-27T02:40:00.000-04:00

Weary of his increasingly erratic behavior, Sesame Street producers will not extend the contract of the program's most popular muppet.

Gary Knell, CEO of Sesame Workshop, the parent company of the popular PBS program, told The Wall Street Journal yesterday that he is severing ties with Elmo.

"As much as we like him personally, we thought it was wrong to renew his deal," Knell said. "His recent conduct has not been acceptable to Sesame Street."

Knell would not elaborate. But those close to the show indicated PBS had grown increasingly irritated over Elmo's public embrace of Scientology.

Nor was the network happy when Elmo, in an interview with NBC's Matt Lauer, launched a blistering attack on the use of antidepressants to combat postpartum depression.

The final straw, industry sources said, was Elmo signing off on his spastic new likeness, TMX Elmo, which was unveiled Tuesday.

Parodying the panic-stricken movements of a typical choking victim, the latest Elmo doll doubles over, falls on its back and kicks its legs before finally rising -- cackling hysterically all the while.

"It completely undignified. It unbecoming of muppet who supposedly has intellectual acuity of 3-year-old," said a source close to Sesame Street who is not the Cookie Monster.

To Sesame Street and PBS executives, the doll also rekindled disturbing memories of Elmo's controversial appearance last year on "Oprah." The doll behaves much as Elmo did on the talk show when he passionately and clumsily declared his love for his onscreen romantic interest, the furry orange creature Zoe.

The couple since have spawned a young daughter, Silli, while denying persistent rumors that the child's father actually is the lovable blue muppet Grover.

The powerful Creative Artists Agency, which represents Elmo and many of Hollywood's other A-list stars, termed the firing "graceless and uncouth."

"This is no way to treat an artist," a CAA release stated. "This unconscionable action will cause brightly colored and highly marketable children's puppets everywhere to question whether they would want to work for an outfit that does this to its greatest asset."

Producers reportedly are involved in serious negotiations with Brad Pitt to replace Elmo in the upcoming sequel to the hit film "Elmo in Grouchland." The anticipated action blockbuster's working title is "Return to Grouchland: Oscar's Days of Rage."

Something Interesting

2006-09-27T01:47:00.000-04:00

VANCOUVER, British Columbia (AP) -- Tired of the criticism of his films, controversial German film director Uwe Boll took on four of his critics in a Vancouver boxing ring, and ended each bout with a knockout.

The director of the vampire flick "BloodRayne," based on a video game and starring Kristanna Loken and Ben Kingsley, issued a fight challenge to his critics several months ago. Fifteen responded.

"I like now the critics," Boll told a news conference after the fights on Saturday. "Everybody who was in the ring showed (guts). Nobody dived.

"If they write about my movies without even seeing the movies then it's really annoying. If you make a movie like 'House of the Dead,' a zombie movie, what are they expecting? 'Schindler's List'?"

First in the ring with the director -- now dubbed "Raging" Boll -- was Richard Kyanka of Lee's Summit, Missouri, webmaster of www.somethingawful.com. He entered the ring clad in Stars and Stripes shorts.

"You are harboring a terrorist," he said of Boll to the Canadian crowd of about 600. "You are all guilty." Boll, grim-faced, KO'd him in the first round.

Jeff Sneider of Los Angeles, a journalist with Ain't It Cool News, went down in a technical knockout in the first round after his trainer threw in the towel.

He said Boll, 41, had told him it was just a joke, a public relations stunt.

"Then he started beating the crap out of my head," he said. "I think he's a jerk. This might be PR but I don't want to keep getting punched in the head."

Chris Alexander of Toronto, Ontario, a horror-move journalist with Rue Morgue radio and magazine, also went down in a knockout, but not before making an artistic statement.

While on the receiving end of a series of blows to the head, Alexander took Boll aback when a stream of blood spewed from his mouth. It turned out Alexander had taken a page from Boll's filmmaking book; the blood was fake.

"I had the fake blood in reserve," he explained.

"I spat it out. I freaked him out exactly like I wanted to do, it was poetry. It was my Jedi mind trick to try and disorient him."

He said he got in a punch for each of Boll's bad films. "I think I got him once in the face for 'Alone in the Dark' and I got maybe one or two for 'BloodRayne.' " he said. " I have absolutely no ... regrets. ... This is the weirdest pop culture bizarre journalism stunt I've ever been involved in."

Nelson Chance Mintner, a web site critic from Frederick, Maryland, was the youngest fighter at 17. He also lost by technical knockout.

Actress Loken was in the audience for the bouts. "It's absolutely ridiculous. That's why I love him," she said.

Boll's next picture is "In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale."

Like "BloodRayne," it's also based on a video game. It features Loken again as well as Jason Statham, John Rhys-Davies, Ray Liotta, Matthew Lillard, Leelee Sobieski, Claire Forlani and Burt Reynolds.

This Blog Is DEAD!!!

2006-09-27T01:46:00.000-04:00

Just wanted nobody to know....lmao!!!!

Big Hair Friday!!!

2006-09-22T02:41:00.000-04:00

For everyone still attending Big Hair Fridays, Lita and Ozzy himself with "Close My Eyes Forever"

I have always loooooved this song!

Hope you all enjoy :)